I walk along the shoreline of Lake Michigan in my bare feet, a cool summer breeze blowing past me. About twenty paces ahead, I see a seagull walking away from me. I get too close, he flies a few feet further away. I slow down, and he waits patiently for me to catch up. All … Continue reading
I’m not someone who pre-judges a film based on the source material; I’ve seen an absolutely horrid adaptation of The Scarlet Letter, and a really fun movie based on the board game Clue. So why do I slowly back away from movies that are based on video games? Well, for one thing, it’s the target … Continue reading
Whew! It’s nice to finally be able to put this puppy to bed. I wasn’t really keeping track of time; I’ve been at this for almost two months now! Thirty four movies (I’m not counting 1492, the one I didn’t see, of course): A couple classics, a few really good ones, and a whole lot … Continue reading
THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123 (2009) Director: Tony Having not worked the obsession with car ramping out of his system during the pointless car chase scenes in Deja Vu, Tony now attempts an even greater amount of incidental vehicular destruction. Oh, wait, I’m sorry; There is a point to this. The police caravan is trying … Continue reading
DEJA VU (2006) Director: Tony I’ve never met Denzel Washington, and can’t give a first hand account of his wit, but he certainly plays “smart” well, which can often be a pretty hard attribute to fake (For reference, see Denise Richards as Nuclear Physicist Dr. Christmas Jones in The World Is Not Enough). What he … Continue reading
The Scott Pilgrim movie doesn’t look the way I want it to. When I read the comic, I was already directing the movie version in my head, as I’m sure many of the rest of you have done. My version was a very realistic, nerd/hipster comedy-drama in the vein of a movie like High Fidelity, … Continue reading
KINGDOM OF HEAVEN (2005) Director: Ridley Having recently been made a “Sir”, it was only a matter of time before Ridley got around to making a movie about how badass knights are. Well, the non-Templar variety, anyway. To be honest, as I generally like to be, this is the type of film that was made … Continue reading
BLACK HAWK DOWN (2001) Director: Ridley They should’ve just sent Eric Bana in solo; Ain’t nobody shootin that Chopper down. Based on a harrowing, real life battle, you have these poor kids fending for their lives hour after hour during a merciless onslaught. I’m sure that it must have been an extremely exhausting experience, because … Continue reading
GLADIATOR (2000) Director: Ridley Oh, Gladiator. I remember being so excited when I saw the first teaser trailer; Colosseum! Gladiators! Tigers! All to the pulse pounding score from Conan the Barbarian, by Basil Poledouris. The adventure that was in store for us all! And apparently, for quite a few of you, it delivered. For me, … Continue reading
G.I.JANE (1997) Director: Ridley Thelma & Louise having worked well for him, Ridley continues to ride the feminist wave. Here, however, he has a female protagonist who’s smarter than the two of them combined. Love her or hate her, you have to admit that Demi Moore went balls-out for this movie. She’s ripped as fuck … Continue reading