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City Island is a small movie about real people. Imagine that! No explosions, no talking animals, no drag queens talking about shopping, no British kids flying around on broomsticks, no overpaid Scientologists, and as far as I could tell, no computer animation. Nope, it’s just a story about a small Italian family and … Continue reading →
Last week I used my free rental at the Redbox to rent Burton’s Alice In Wonderland. After sitting through it I wanted my free rental back! I can sum up the movie in 1 word. BORING. I’m sitting here watching it and was just bored to shit. I didn’t find it engaging at all. Not … Continue reading →
Re-watching Inland Empire brought on the thirst. Not the thirst for sprite, the thirst for rapper-funded energy drinks or even the thirst for suki suckhouse. No, the thirst of which I speak is none other than the David-Lynch thirst, and once it has its hooks in me I begin eying the collection and my calender … Continue reading →
In this edition of The Neurotic Monologues: Some venting, some personal happenings, a very short TV comment, and an update on that promised writing exercise. 1 . A study on human stupidity – My first dance recitalI decided to stop talking about dance and actually enroll in a modern dance class. This was six months … Continue reading →
So, I saw Splice the other night. And to be honest, it’s hard to say what I think of it. But “WTF?” is pretty accurate. We all knew how weird this would be, just look at the trailer one more time. For the most part, I was blown away by this small private world that … Continue reading →
THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123 (2009) Director: Tony Having not worked the obsession with car ramping out of his system during the pointless car chase scenes in Deja Vu, Tony now attempts an even greater amount of incidental vehicular destruction. Oh, wait, I’m sorry; There is a point to this. The police caravan is trying … Continue reading →
Disclaimer: Portions of this post were previously written by me and published at Examiner.com. I will use this blog to explore many of the following themes and questions brought forth in this post. What if a movie is so aware of its badness that it’s actually good at being bad? Is there such a thing … Continue reading →
Instant Tough Guy:Shaved head and/or goateeAffliction/Tapout shirtMenacing walk/stareTattoo (with clothing choice to accentuate) Instant Ten: Any GirlAny Desperate Guy Instant Discredit: Human BeingBud Light in Hand Instant Public Hazard: Asian WomanCar Instant Weight Loss: Chick Fil-A Chicken Biscuit20 minutesToilet Instant Film Critic: BlogHuman BeingSpeak Preview Pass Instant Douche: Human beingSandalsSocks Instant Twilight Zone: The Movie … Continue reading →
Dear Silent Hill 2, Thought you had me beat, eh? Well think again! Your nine year reign of terror over me has finally been ended! I have bested you, friend. Let it be known from this day forth that no PS2 game shall make me hide in fear! [DISCLAIMER: Ecco: The Tides of Time for … Continue reading →
DEJA VU (2006) Director: Tony I’ve never met Denzel Washington, and can’t give a first hand account of his wit, but he certainly plays “smart” well, which can often be a pretty hard attribute to fake (For reference, see Denise Richards as Nuclear Physicist Dr. Christmas Jones in The World Is Not Enough). What he … Continue reading →