Whatever else you want to say about it, Piranha 3D is a movie that keeps its promises. The trailers, the commercials, and all the pre-press promised that Piranha 3D would lean heavy on its R rating. Its makers and its promoting swore up and down that we’d see more gore and more nudity than … Continue reading
I didn’t like Scott Pilgrim. Wait, wait, wait don’t go! Believe me, I’m more disappointed in myself than you are of me. An esteemed jury of chewers have decided that I can remain on the boards but they are keeping an eye on me. You don’t know what it’s like, being on the outside looking … Continue reading
I finished the last episode of the final season today. I know; “A little late”, right? I don’t have cable, and my preferred method of watching television is to wait until a season ends, then absorb it as quickly as possible. Fuck serialization; I need instant gratification. Amazingly, I was able to stay away from … Continue reading
It’s amazing how liking your job in some fashion, no matter how small, can impact how long the day feels. As someone who has worked countless 16 hour days, night shifts, and done tons of manual labor, I can honestly say that nothing has ever felt so soul-crushingly long as my current five hour shifts … Continue reading
Being in LA, and trying to break into something somewhat sorta related to the business of movies, I am friends with people that have gone to or are going to film school. Not to mention whatever Chewers have gone to or are going to film school themselves. And since I watch a hell of a … Continue reading
About an hour into The American, George Clooney walks into an empty café where the proprietor is watching the great masterpiece Once Upon A Time In The West. (It’s the scene that introduces Henry Fonda’s bad guy.) If director Anton Corbijn wanted guys like me to use this reference as a cue to compare … Continue reading
I just turned 25 and I finally know what I want to do. I want to write about films. A wise man once offered his advice on how to be a film critic. His top tip was: Don’t. This suited me just fine. I foolishly took this advice literally and did nothing, delighted that I … Continue reading
Ass. And apparently in keeping with this she’s released some appropriate press photos. I’m hearing a catch phrase like… ‘Putting the Ass Back in Suck Ass Fuck Face…’ or something like that. How did I happen to know Lita Ford had a new album? Am I a member of the fan club? Nope. I was … Continue reading
In brief; It’s a good film. It may not be for everyone, but it’s a slow burn, much more of a character piece than I was expecting, and very effectively creepy at times. If that sounds like something that could potentially be your cup of tea, go check it out. If you’re looking for something … Continue reading
Amongst my friends, I’m sometimes known as a prognosticator. If I see a tiny film that sends out a few ripples, or perhaps is unjustly ignored, and I can recognize a great deal of potential in the film’s director, I like to “sell” that movie and filmmaker to as many people as possible. When Shallow … Continue reading