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The motion picture studios send us vermillions of DVD releases for the purpose of review. More titles than you can shake a stick at, unless you have a lot of time and a particularly sturdy stick. Unlike most sites [and weirdly a source of nitpicking from some detractors who we’ve discovered are dumb and lonely asexual prick assholes], we review everything we’re sent. Even the gay vampire program Lair (from the makers of Dante’s Cove). We have a wide array of reviewers, all with functioning nervous systems and all ready to entertain YOU with their puns and prose. You. Are. Welcome.

THE SPECIAL EDITION – 10.22.07

There are a ton of releases this week that would make almost any movie lover happy. I’ll start off with the basic ones and then get into the meat and potatoes of the week’s premiere releases. There are a number of recent films being released this week that would satisfy any type of movie fans. … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: DORM OF THE DEAD

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Under the Bed FilmsMSRP: $14.98RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 90 minSPECIAL FEATURES: Making of Featurette Trailers The Pitch It’s Cinemax After Dark with zombies, bad acting and a deaf sound editor. The Humans Ciara Richards, Adrianna Eder, Christopher Slade, Andrea “Miss Howard Stern” Ownbey, Jackey Hall The Nutshell A college professor … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: CRIMINAL MINDS – SEASON TWO

Buy it at Amazon: CLICK HERE!Studio: ParamountMSRP: $64.99Rated: US = Nil, Canada = PGRunning Time: 23 episodes (16 hrs., 47 min.)Special Features:• Profilers, Profiled• The Physical Evidence• Behavioral Science: Real-Life Criminal Minds• Meet Kirsten Vangsness• Gag Reel• Deleted ScenesThe PitchNUMB3RS has a kid brother who idolizes Silence of the Lambs, has seen every episode of … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: HOAX, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: MiramaxMSRP: $19.99RATED: RSPECIAL FEATURES:• Stranger than Fiction making of featurette.• Mike Wallace: Reflections on a Con• Deleted Scenes w/Commentary by Lasse Hallstrom & William Wheeler• Extended Scene Business is Pleasure• Feature Commentary w/Hallstrom & Wheeler• Feature Commentary w/producers Leslie Holleran & Johua D. MaurerThe Pitch A writer lies about co-writing … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: EAT MY DUST

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Buena Vista Home VideoMSRP: $19.99RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 89 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• How to crash on a dime: The Making of Eat my Dust!• Original TrailerThe Pitch If the characters from Waiting for Guffman remade Smokey in the Bandit in the style of Robert Altman you might get something like this… … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: CUTTING CLASS

BUY IT FROM AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: LionsgateMSRP: $14.98RATING: UnratedRUNNING TIME: 91 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: NothingThe PitchCrappy music. Cheesy one-liners. A mysterious killer stalking the denizens of a high school. A basketball team in short shorts. Must be the 80s. The Humans Donovan Leitch, Jill Schoelen, Brad Pitt, Roddy McDowell, and Martin Mull. "Gene Parmesan at your … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: YOU KILL ME

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: IFC FilmsMSRP: $19.95RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 93 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES: Commentary with Director John Dahl and Writers Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely "Behind the Scenes" featurette Before & After Visual Effects Comparison Theatrical Trailer The Pitch “Raging alcoholic kills more than just brain cells.” The Humans Sir Ben Kingsley, Téa Leoni, … Continue reading

CLASH OF THE TARTANS: CARVED

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE STUDIO: TartanMSRP: $19.95RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 90 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Trailer• TV Spots • Behind the Scenes• Cast InterviewsNote: All screencaps have been crafted to best approximate the experience of viewing the film. Accordingly, there are no entertaining captions. The Pitch A chick with a gash for a mouth (slang) isn’t … Continue reading