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The motion picture studios send us vermillions of DVD releases for the purpose of review. More titles than you can shake a stick at, unless you have a lot of time and a particularly sturdy stick. Unlike most sites [and weirdly a source of nitpicking from some detractors who we’ve discovered are dumb and lonely asexual prick assholes], we review everything we’re sent. Even the gay vampire program Lair (from the makers of Dante’s Cove). We have a wide array of reviewers, all with functioning nervous systems and all ready to entertain YOU with their puns and prose. You. Are. Welcome.

DVD REVIEW: MONSTER HOUSE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony PicturesMSRP: $28.95RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 91 Minutes SPECIAL FEATURES: Filmmaker Commentary 7 Featurettes including: Imaginary Heroes, Beginner’s Luck, The Best of Friends, Lots of Dots, Black Box Theater, Making It Real, Did You Hear That? Evolution of a scene: Eliza vs. Nebbercracker The Art of Monster House – Photo … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: SUPERMAN RETURNS

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Bros.MSRP: $34.98RATED: PG-13RUNNING TIME: 154 Minutes SPECIAL FEATURES: "Requiem for Krypton: Making Superman Returns": a comprehensive 3-hour documentary including: Secret Origins and First Issues: Crystallizing Superman The Crystal Method: Designing Superman An Affinity for Beachfront Property: Shooting Superman The Joy of Lex: Menacing Superman He’s Always Around: Wrapping … Continue reading

THE SPECIAL EDITION – 11.15.06

The reason for my lackadaisical posting of this column wasn’t because the dog ate it or even because I just plain forgot. No, I believe I can pin it on one man. Jesus H. Christ Calling the supremely disappointing The Da Vinci Code anything less than severe (Devin even groused: “it’s retarded," while Nick said … Continue reading

DVD SCATTERSHOT: LIONSGATE HORROR

The Pitch "I’ve got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty / I’ve got whozits and whatsits galore / You want thingamabobs? / I’ve got twenty! / And they’ve all / been employed / to kill whores…" Lionsgate snaps up distribution rights on a lot of horror, for which we all are very grateful. Sometimes, these horror flicks … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: TALES FROM THE CRYPT – SEASON 5

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Home VideoMSRP: $39.98RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 380 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • Virtual comic book The Pitch "Thirteen more demented morality tales acted out by your favorite B-listers and book ended by horrific puns belted out by a decaying puppet." The Humans Ed Begley Jr., Clancy Brown, Steve Buscemi, Tim Curry, … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: DA VINCI CODE, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony Home EntertainmentMSRP: $29.98RATED: PG-13RUNNING TIME: 149 Minutes SPECIAL FEATURES: Uncover the symbols of the Da Vinci Code First Day on Set A Conversation with Dan Brown A Portrait of Langdon 10 Featurettes in Total The Pitch Albinos are pissed! Scholars are dying! There’s all sorts of religious conspiracy … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL – EXTRAORDINARILY DELUXE EDITION

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony Pictures Home EntertainmentMSRP: $29.95RATED: PGRUNNING TIME: 92 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • Subtitles for People Who Don’t Like This Movie• On-Screen Screenplay• Commentary w/ Pythons• "Follow the Killer Rabbit" trivia feature• "A Taste of Spamalot" featurette• "The Holy Grail Challenge" trivia quizzes• "Secrets of the Holy Grail" trailer• Sing-a-longs• "The … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: LAND OF THE BLIND

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE! STUDIO: BauerMSRP: $23.99RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 101 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• "Anatomy of a Thriller" featurette The Pitch"The vendetta was just the beginning."The HumansRalph Fiennes (Maid in Manhattan), Donald Sutherland (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), Tom Hollander (Enigma), Lara Flynn Boyle (Men in Black II) Admittedly her letter was easy to find, but … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: HARVEY BIRDMAN – ATTORNEY AT LAW VOL. 2

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Home VideoMSRP: $29.98RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 22 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • Audio commentary• Behind the scenes featurettes• Clothes-less animation• Commercial spots• Deleted scenes• Music videoThe Pitch"When the citizens of the cartoon world find themselves in hot water and on the wrong side of the law, they turn to one man … Continue reading