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The motion picture studios send us vermillions of DVD releases for the purpose of review. More titles than you can shake a stick at, unless you have a lot of time and a particularly sturdy stick. Unlike most sites [and weirdly a source of nitpicking from some detractors who we’ve discovered are dumb and lonely asexual prick assholes], we review everything we’re sent. Even the gay vampire program Lair (from the makers of Dante’s Cove). We have a wide array of reviewers, all with functioning nervous systems and all ready to entertain YOU with their puns and prose. You. Are. Welcome.

ANCHOR BAY UPFRONT: MAY ’07 CONTINUED!

This month’s Anchor Bay Upfront focused early on Hellboy: Blood and Iron (we’ve got a DVD review coming up soon;) but wait! there’s more! Never content to rest on their horror-laurels, we’ve got a couple other releases here to highlight for you. A bit of the ol’ issues-based horror, and some glorious, bloody vampires. Right … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: FOUNTAIN, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERESTUDIO: Warner Home VideoMSRP: $27.95RATED: PG-13RUNNING TIME: 96 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • “Inside The Fountain: Death and Rebirth”: gallery of six featurettes exploring the movie’s various periods and settings• Theatrical trailer The Pitch When you hug the tree, the tree hugs you back… hard. The Humans Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz, Ellen … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: WEDDING PARTY, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: TLA ReleasingMSRP: $19.99RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 92 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES: None The Pitch "It’s Titus Andronicus meets Gosford Park in Deutschland!" The Humans German versions of Tim Robbins and Tim Curry! Uwe Ochsenknecht and Armin Rohde, plus Josef Heynert, Lisa Potthoff, Sandra Borgmann, Imogen Kogge. The Nutshell Hermann Walzer (Rohde) wants … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: JESSE STONE – DEATH IN PARADISE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony PicturesMSRP: $24.96RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 87 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • Previews The Pitch Jesse Stone returns for more hard boiled domestic disturbance action in a small Massachusetts town. His facial hair remains unchanged.The Humans Tom Selleck, Viola Davis, William Devane and Steven Flynn The Nutshell Jesse Stone’s fantastic life of … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: JESSE STONE – NIGHT PASSAGE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony PicturesMSRP: $24.96RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 89 minutesSPECIAL FEATURES: • Previews The Pitch Jesse Stone is a man with man personal demons. You can tell this because he drinks scotch every five seconds. He’s troubled! That’s just great, because he’s stepping in as sheriff in a troubled town with many … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: HITCHER, THE (2007)

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: RogueMSRP: $29.98RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 84 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Deleted scenes• Behind-the-scenes featurettes The Pitch "It’s Tom and Jerry meets Halloween!" The Humans Sean "Gravitas" Bean, Sophia "Hot Republican" Bush, Zachary "Who?" Knighton. The Nutshell For the love of god, don’t pick up hitchhikers! In the grand tradition of the recent … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: APOCALYPTO

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: TouchstoneMSRP: $29.99RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 136 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Commentary by: Director Mel Gibson and co-writer Farhad Safinia• Becoming Mayan: Making Apocalypto• Deleted scene with optional commentary by director Mel Gibson and co-writer Farhad Safinia The Pitch“Mel Gibson’s making another subtitled, graphically violent flick about an ancient people? As long as … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: VENUS

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: MiramaxMSRP: $29.99RATED: RRUNNING TIME: 94 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Commentary with director Roger Michell and producer Kevin Loader• Venus, A Real Work of Art Making-of Featurette• Deleted Scenes The Pitch“A seventy-five year-old man trying to fuck a twenty-five year-old girl? Who wouldn’t want to see that?”The HumansPeter O’Toole, Jodie Whittaker, Leslie … Continue reading

THE SPECIAL EDITION – 05.21.07

Damn, this week is pretty stacked. There is a lot of pretty good releases and most of them are of older movies. I’m gonna touch on the four new releases that actually matter this week and then there is a lot to cover with re-releases, special editions and Criterion releases. Let’s get to it. NEW … Continue reading