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The motion picture studios send us vermillions of DVD releases for the purpose of review. More titles than you can shake a stick at, unless you have a lot of time and a particularly sturdy stick. Unlike most sites [and weirdly a source of nitpicking from some detractors who we’ve discovered are dumb and lonely asexual prick assholes], we review everything we’re sent. Even the gay vampire program Lair (from the makers of Dante’s Cove). We have a wide array of reviewers, all with functioning nervous systems and all ready to entertain YOU with their puns and prose. You. Are. Welcome.

DVD REVIEW: CHRIS ISAAK – LIVE IN CONCERT

BUY IT FROM AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Koch VisionMSRP: $19.99RATING: NRRUNNING TIME: 47 min.SPECIAL FEATURES:– Photo gallery– Extra non-Isaak tracks The Pitch “It’s Chris Isaak and his band… on a stage!” The Humans Chris Isaak and his band… on a stage The Nutshell Chris Isaak performs with his band.  On a stage.  The handsome crooner known … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: ONE TREE HILL – SEASON 2

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Home VideoMSRP: $59.98RATED: UnratedRUNNING TIME: 993 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Diaries from the Set featurettes• The Music of One Tree Hill featurette• Change is Good featurette• Selected Commentaries• Unaired Scenes "Pop" isn’t a derisive word; it’s descriptive. It implies something suitable for consumption by a broad demographic, something inoffensive and … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: HISTORY OF USC FOOTBALL, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner Brothers MSRP: $19.99RATED: NRRUNNING TIME: 102 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Second Banana Featurette• The McKay Mystery featurette• Heisman Club featurette• Extra Interviews The Pitch “We’ll use a series of interviews and stock footage to string together the history of USC football. It’ll be great, just like USC. Because the USC … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: DON’T BE A MENACE – SE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: MiramaxMSRP: $19.99RATED: UnratedRUNNING TIME: 89 min.SPECIAL FEATURES:• Deleted Scene• Wayans Bros. Behind the Scenes• Hood Movie GumboFull title, for the record: Don’t Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the ‘Hood.The Pitch"With a title like this, who needs a script? Don’t answer that."The HumansShawn Wayans … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: DISNEY PRINCESSES

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE AND HERE!STUDIO: Walt Disney Home VideoMSRP: $19.99/$19.99RATED: NR/NRRUNNING TIME: 38/68 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES:• Princess Tea Time Game• Dance Along• Karaoke• Princess Story Builder The Pitch “We take old content and re-release it. Then we put it in pink boxes. No one will notice old content if we put it in … Continue reading

THE SPECIAL EDITION – 9.20.05

I believe someone entirely more talented said it better when he wrote – "we were somewhere outside of Barstow when the drugs began to take hold." Not that you’d want to be outside of Barstow, primarily because it’s a gigantic wasteland of nothingness while the highway from Needles into Los Angeles is the place where … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: BOOGEYMAN, THE (1980)

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Sony Pictures Home EntertainmentMSRP: $14.94RATED: UnratedRUNNING TIME: 82 MinutesSPECIAL FEATURES: A throwaway sequel, Return of the Boogeyman The Pitch "Oh god oh god I had this great dream and now I lost it–" The Humans Suzanna Love (Strangers in Paradise, Cocaine Cowboy), Ron James (Tommy Boy), John Carradine (The … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: OUTSIDERS, THE (SE)

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: Warner HomeMSRP: $26.99RATED: PG-13RUNNING TIME: 113 min.SPECIAL FEATURES:• Watch the Movie with the Director• Watch the Movie with the Greasers and a Soc• Staying Gold: A Look Back at The Outsiders• S.E. Hinton on Location in Tulsa• The Casting of The Outsiders• Readings• NBC News Today Segment• Additional Scenes• … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: MUMMY LIVES, THE

BUY IT AT AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: CannonMSRP: $14.96RATED: PG-13, “For Some Elements of Horror Violence.”RUNNING TIME: 98 min.SPECIAL FEATURES: Pictures that move — and talk. It’s all the rage. The Pitch“I ran into Tony Curtis in the lobby and he’s not doing anything this afternoon!“The HumansTony Curtis (Spartacus), Greg Wrangler (The Young and the Restless), … Continue reading

DVD REVIEW: CAMPFIRE TALES

BUY IT FROM AMAZON: CLICK HERE!STUDIO: New LineMSRP: $19.99RATING: RRUNNING TIME: 93 min.SPECIAL FEATURES:-Not really The Pitch “It’s urban legends meets Urban Legends!” The Humans Ron Livingston (Dill Scallion, Body Shots), Christopher Masterson (Scary Movie 2, Dragonheart: A New Beginning), Christine Taylor (The Brady Bunch Movie, Night of the Demons 2), Glenn Quinn (Dr. Giggles, … Continue reading