LaneForget Diane Lane’s long and well-regarded acting career, that woman ranked on VH1s Hottest Celebrity Bodies. I don’t remember what she was ranked, but she’s in there. Anyone else could have retired with that honor, but to her credit as a career professional, she keeps on keepin’ on.

Next on her list? Untraceable, where Ms. Lane plays an FBI (Female Body Inspector?) agent in a real hurry to nab an online predator before he does more damage with his predatory ways. Looks like Dateline and Chris Hanses are playing fair by leaving some of the riff-raff for the FBI to clean up and glean some spotlight. Untraceable has added a friends list worth of supporting cast to its roster with Son of Hanks, The Kim Smacker, GI Gullible and M. Knight’s Butterfly Lady. And by all that racquet I mean Colin Hanks as Lane’s FBI partner, Billy Burke as the guy who gets into Lane’s pants, Joseph Cross as the predatory bastard and Mary Beth Hurt as Mom.

The gang will on converge on Portland Oregon next month where they’ll probably get some moody greenery, moody weather and maybe some moody NBA players to hang out with. Untraceable will be directed by the guy who directed the nazis to put a bullet straight into Bruce Willis in Hart’s War and gave us Dennis Quaid in age makeup with Frequency, Mr. Greg Hoblit.

I don’t know this Hoblit character or anything, but I’d bet the next person to give him a JRR Tolkien themed joke gets punched right in the nipple.