Backwoods.jpg There was a time when Gary Oldman was a thespian badass. Drug dealing psychopath, maniacal arms dealer, wrinkly, ass-headed blood sucker. Now he’s taking bit parts in B-list productions about magic nerds, choir boys who drive tank cars and the mustachioed men who befriend them. I dunno. Used to be a day when Oldman carried some clout.

While first glimpse at the publicity photo would apparently indicate he’s starring in "Dr. Livingston’s Adventures Shooting Elephants in Africa", the shot is misleading. In fact, thanks to the horror propagator Lionsgate (via Spanish horror propagator Filmax), Oldman is starring in a Spanish produced English language horror film called "The Backwoods". Looks like Gary’s trying to get back to form.

Centered around what happens to people when they don’t mind their own damned business in the forest (when will you outdoorsy jackasses ever learn?), "The Backwoods" stars Oldman as a cabin owner who likes guns and ominous hunterly quips like "There are only Hunters and Prey… That’s the only fucking thing in this world." You know, the only thing besides movies, video games and makin’ babies. Either way, he loans his cabin to a group of four friends who seem to run afoul of the locals when they find and try to help a disfigured girl in the woods. Oldman looks to get involved in the subsequent escalation of bloodshed. At least you know his part will be well acted.

You can check out the trailer here and rejoice with me in the continued survival of Oldman’s hairy upper lip.