The Hellraiser series went from very good to good to ass horrible in a span of three films. After that it went someplace even Warwick Davis wouldn’t… oh shit, HE DID. When horror franchises go into outer space they tend to be ready for a bit of euthanasia. Prime Example: Alien 3.

Clive Barker’s a fabulous creator and a muscular gay man. He’s also dipping his toe back into his first cinematic well by rebooting his signature franchise. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre did it. The Hills Have Eyes did it and you may remember a kid with a bad haircut on 6.6.06. You KNOW they’ll do it with other big franchises like Demonic Toys and The Boogens, so what’s wrong with ol’ Pinhead and his crew of melanin hating cronies?

From today’s press release on the matter:

"Dimension Films is proud to announce that Clive
Barker, whose spine-tingling films have terrified audiences across the globe,
is set to team with Dimension Films to remake his most celebrated thriller,
“Hellraiser.” Barker will write the screenplay and serve as a producer. Anthony
Diblasi and Joe Daley will co-produce the remake. No director or cast has been
attached to the project yet. The announcement was made today by Bob
Weinstein, Co-Chairman of The Weinstein Company.

While the presence of the name WEINSTEIN may scare or irritate some of you, realize that these guys are in a different place now than when they ass raped Mimic. They’ll let Clive be as hands on as Clive wants and audiences are hellbound to wake up at some point and smell the brimstone and realize that quality needs to be present in this new wave of horror in addition to memorable titles and jump cut scares. Hellraiser is quality. It’s one of the more resoundingly effective films in the genre and it’s still creepy even though the sequels all but made the villain characters into IPOD’s in a mansuit.

This could be great. Then again, it could be one big ass ATM withdrawal for Clive Barker but since he became the master of kid’s fantasy I don’t think he’s hurting in the pocketbook. That wasn’t a gay joke. Sorta.

Please be great. Please be great. Please be great.