you’re a brother or whether you’re a mother, you’ll probably be this film. Actually, no. You will not. That said, you can win this DVD and that’s almost as good or even better, depending on how you feel about Frankie Muniz as a character named Swink Sylvania.

Swink Sylvania.

Stay Alive is the latest horror flick to feature a video game element at its core, evidence of such as provided by this IMDB summary:

After the brutal death of a friend, a group of friends
find themselves in possession of a video-game called "Stay Alive," a
blood-curdling true story of a 17th century noblewoman known as the
Blood Countess. After playing the game when they know they shouldn’t,
however, the friends realize that once they die in the game–they die
for real. As their numbers begin dropping and as they begin dying in
the ways they died in the game, the remaining friends realize they must
defeat the Blood Countess or accept their fates.

Do not piss the Blood Countess off, that’s my advice. If Devin had been writing this article I think he’d have tossed in some wishful thinking that a Blood Countess might switch over to World of Warcraft but since you’re stuck with me, expect a little Swink to the Sylvania. It’s all I got. Either way, the film has kills, hot young women, and what I expect to be a grisly end for Adam Goldberg. So basically, it’s Schindler’s List. Same ingredients. What’s not to like?

I’m actually looking forward to this DVD, especially with a new director’s cut. I know my podcast compadre Justin Waddell is, as he tried to get me to see Stay Alive in theaters almost as hard as he tried to woo the woman who is now his lovely wife. On video, his dreams will be answered in a way only the Swink Sylvania can provide. In short, it’s Muniz to his ears.

Want to win Stay Alive all for your lonesome? Cast these four video game movies for me and tell me what twist you’d add to make it work onscreen. I have a ton of these discs coming, so there’ll be a lot of winners. All you need to do is use the link below, include your mailing address, and make STAYALIVE the subject line in capital letters. No other subject line will qualify. Here’s the four video games you need to come up with info for and ONLY ONE ENTRY PER EMAIL ADDRESS!

1. Berserk (in honor of the sublime Crank).
2. Crazy Climber.
3. Rush’n Attack.
4. Custer’s Revenge.

(Follow the rules above and include your mailing address)