Oh, Jessica. Jessica, Jessica, Jessica. I love you as much as I’m allowed (judge says it has to be from at least 500 feet away), but I have to question the thought process when it comes to selecting projects. An Adam Sandler movie? You’re so much better than that. Just look at you. I mean, really. Wow.
Yes, the divine Ms. Biel has joined Sandler and Kevin James in the theoretical comedy I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, which (in case that crafty title threw you) revolves around gay marriage. But wait, there’s an ingenious twist! See, these two burly firemen are just pretending to be homosexuals so they can get married and take advantage of domestic-partner benefits, which is apparently less convoluted than just paying for insurance. But then Sandler falls in love with the attorney representing the case, because she’s Jessica Biel. Mixed messages no doubt result in attempted hilarity.