From the mind behind the mega-hit Syfy show you’ve probably never heard of (EUREKA) comes a tribute to all those no-budget Syfy original movies and the “so bad, they’re good” films that inspired them. Move over Roger Corman, step back Ed Wood, make way on your weekend programming schedule Mr. Stern, because here comes Andrew Cosby’s 365 DAYS OF SCI-FI.

And it’s all happening here! Each day, your friends at CHUD will bring you a brand new bad movie pitch — the best of the worst title Cosby can come up with, no matter where he’s at or what he’s doing, rain or shine, drunk or sober. That’s a whole year of the quality concepts you’ve come to expect from the network that brought you MANSQUITO and SHARKTOPUS.

365 days of Sci-Fi Archive

And now… DAY TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY-NINE:

“Not sure you can turn Goonies into a teen sex comedy without breaking a few laws, but let’s find out…”

– Andy Cosby (Twitter)

“Able-Bodied Semen.”

AMERICAN PIRATE: In a desperate last bid to lose his virginity before graduating high school, undersexed teen geek KYLE COOPER spends the money he was saving for a car to join a month long sailing trip around the world, hoping to score with the girl of his dreams, who’s also signed up for the program.  Unfortunately, before love can blossom, the girl is kidnapped by Somali pirates, forcing Kyle and a handful of other nautical nerds to rise to the occasion and rescue her before it’s too late.  Along the way, they discover the existence of a lost treasure buried somewhere in the Bermuda triangle.  And that’s when things really get weird.

Nick Says: Let’s face it. She’s going to be useless once Kyle finds here. Those Somali pirates love sex. Sex with the infirm, sex with four-legged things, and even a little 2 Somali, 1 Cup. She’s DONE.

Disclaimer:

This article series is in no way affiliated with SyFy. This is a creative experiment and ongoing test of nerves that is perpetrated by a few insane people and should be construed as such. If for some reason these people actually make one of these as a feature it must be chalked up to their own lunacy. These are the intellectual property of Mr. Andrew Cosby and not the property of CHUD.com or SyFy.