In today’s “no shit” news, it looks like Sony is about to begin gearing up the prequel to massive smash hit The Da Vinci Code, Dan Brown’s Angels and Demons. Da Vinci is one of those movies that makes studio execs very happy – despite the fact that it truly stinks and the critics have come out savagely against it, the film had one of the all-time great opening weekends. It’s the kind of thing that proves to the guys in the suits that quality is not a part of the Hollywood blockbuster equation.
The very good news for Sony is that they don’t have to actually make Angels and Demons – modern CGI technology will allow them to pluck actors from Da Vinci and place them in other contexts, and since the two novels have the exact same story – a renowned expert is murdered and Robert Langdon gets called in on the mystery. He uncovers a conspiracy alongside a beautiful young relative of the victim, who is also an expert in something. They are chased by a lone killing machine defined by one aspect – in this case, an Arab. Also, much like The Da Vinci Code, Angels and Demons is written specifically for the special ed market – they can just change references from “Opus Dei” to “the Illuminati.”
By the way, did anyone write a story about Da Vinci’s triumph of the swill at the box office using the headline “Opie’s Day”? They should have.