With 80s nostalgia escalating (I can’t wait for pegged pants and that “tidal wave” high-hair to come back into style) and studios continually mining the recent garish past for material, the big-screen version of Magnum P.I. was inevitable. I suppose everything is inevitable, or it wouldn’t happen, but it’s too damn early in the day for abstract philosophy.

Anyway, Hawaii-based private investigator Thomas Magnum is revving his snazzy red Ferrari for Universal’s feature (even though I could swear Magnum died at the end of the series run, but I suppose continuity isn’t a priority). Dodgeball helmer Rawson Marshall Thurber is now at the wheel for producer Brian Grazer, which I guess means it’s going to be more attempted comedy than the ultra-serious tone of the TV series. Yes… it’s another unnecessary (and sure-to-be-profitable) remake, but I certainly don’t consider Magnum P.I. to be sacred territory and Dodgeball was pretty funny, so have at it, fella.

For those who’ve never handled a remote control, the long-running CBS show revolved around a Navy SEAL turned private eye (Magnum and his sundry chums will likely now be Gulf War vets rather than Vietnam buddies) who resided on the luxurious estate of a mysterious writer and verbally sparred with his anal-retentive butler when not tooling around the islands solving mysteries and baring his excessively hirsute chest. George Clooney was reportedly pursued for the part when the project first started a couple of years ago, and Austin Powers co-writer Mike McCullers penned a previous draft.