STUDIO: Live / Artisan
MSRP: $27.98
RUNNING TIME: 97 Minutes
• Deleted Scenes
• Music Videos
• Behind-the-Scenes featurette

The Pitch

"It’s Rock Star with some of the rock and none of the stars."

The Humans

Pell James, Steven Strait, Kip Pardue, Carrie Fisher, a slumming Peter Weller and a happy-to-have-the-work Ashlee Simpson.

"So how’s my angst coming through, dude?"
"Not good."
"What do you recommend?"
"Try looking like a Calvin Klein model who just heard that the anorexic fag look is out."

The Nutshell

Pell James is a model named Brier who has one of those just-missed-the-person-of-my-dreams run-ins with a struggling musician named Luke (Strait) in New York, just as he’s moving to LA. Cut to two years later and Brier moves out to LA also to pursue acting. They have another meeting at a club where Luke performs and they pick up where they left off, although she’s reluctant to see him because her boyfriend is a famous rock star who cheats on her and never calls her and she’s still not over him. But she and her friend Clea (Simpson) devise a plan to jump start Luke’s career by photographing him with a famous model, blogging him on the internet and starting buzz. That leads to a recording contract for him, he grows a big head, ignores his brother and becomes a jerk. The whole thing crashes down around him and he realizes that the only thing he ever needed was the girl.

"So Ashlee, what’s it like to sing on SNL?"
"Hell if I know…"

The Package

Surprising amount of stuff on this disc, including several deleted scenes, independent music videos (i.e. clips from the film set to music from the film), a behind-the-scenes deal and a director’s commentary. The film looks good in 1.85:1 and the music doesn’t altogether suck in 5.0 and 2.0 Dolby Digital, although it’s not really my bag. Those into Simpson’s music (i.e. girls 13 and below and sweaty perverts 47 and above) will dig that she performs a few numbers in the movie and a couple of the music videos are hers.

"Dude, are any chicks flashing their cans? I can’t see a thing through this hair…"

The Lowdown

Alas, yet another tale of talented but struggling young twentysomethings going to the big bad city to make their fortunes in their respected fields, be it acting, singing, dancing, etc. The difference between Undiscovered and films like Center Stage, Coyote Ugly and Save The Last Dance is that there is no difference. It’s exactly the same story with a different setting and different circumstances (i.e. same shit, different day). Undiscovered mines no new gems in this coal mine of a genre that’s increasingly running dry. It’s directly derivative of Rock Star without the excess or the fun. There’s definitely no Batmobile drag racing here.

I had to throw a little something in to spice up the review. I’m sure you all understand.

The leads are about as interesting as…well they’re not really. I saw this movie and I felt like I’d seen it a hundred times before, probably because I had. Carrie Fisher must have had to renew her SAG card or something, Peter Weller shows up for about 15 minutes to collect a paycheck and Ashlee Simpson takes a break from lip-synching on stage so that she can lip-synch on film. The movie looks decent and is directed fairly ably by video director Meiert Avis, who’s done work for U2, J.Lo and The Boss, but everything in it is just so pedestrian that I wished I were watching some music videos. Plus there are more clichés than in Karen’s family reunion (little Mutant X reference there). You’ve got the aforementioned subway passing, the asshole music exec, the poonhound asshole rocker, the hipster actress who sings, the comic relief sibling, the angst-ridden artist who becomes a star only to want to be an artist again, the savvy agent, and the cool-as-shit industry legend. All in all, the most interesting thing in this tale is a skateboarding dog and that about sums it up.

"Mr. Weller, were those monsters really that scary in Leviathan?"
"Nah, Ernie and Hector were sweethearts…"

5.1 out of 10