I’ve previously made assertions that the Spider-Man movies’ albatross (in regards to quality, not financial success, obviously) could’ve been prevented with the simple casting of pouty-lipped firetop Alicia Witt as Mary-Jane Watson (or, considering Dunst’s “transformation” consisted of red coloring and hair extensions, Jessica Biel). But alas, we’ll have to accept Peter Parker’s lifelong fixation on the droopy-lidded mope we got instead.
Besides, apparently the delicious Witt prefers older men. She’ll be playing the love interest of increasingly screamy (and unprofitable) Al Pacino in the crime thriller 88 Minutes. Pacino plays a college professor who moonlights for the FBI as a forensic psychologist, with Witt serving as his teaching assistant and a whole lot more. Sure I’m no Pacino or Clint Eastwood, but why is it that when I dig girls half my age it’s just viewed as creepy? Or illegal?
The movie, directed by longtime producer Jon Avnet, has Pacino’s teacher getting a threat telling him that he’s got slightly less than an hour and a half left to live. With his daughter-aged babe at his side, he starts looking for possible suspects, who may include a trouble student (Leelee Sobieski) and a death row inmate (Neal McDonough).