.You lucky sons of bitches.

I have a stack of Mindhunters DVDs and they’re meant for you! That’s right, Renny Harlin’s long-delayed guilty pleasure starring Christian Slater, Val Kilmer, LL Cool J, Clifton Collins Jr., Johnny Lee Miller, and many more is not only here in a surprisingly apportioned DVD but it’s here with a chance for you to get it for free. The film is about a handful of agents on an island who are supposed to be getting on the job training but instead are systematically killed off by ONE OF THEIR OWN! Agatha Christie would be proud. Or sue.

How good at behavioral science are you? I’m going to create profiles for a few Hollywood folks and I want you to identify them. Don’t worry if you get it wrong, it’s about making the effort. This is a fun little game for you and I. So, figure out who I’m referring to in these five questions and send me an entry. You just might win!

Please do not forget to include your mailing address!

1. Sure I’m a hothead but I’ve worked with the greats. Arnold. Coppola. Nolte. C. Thomas Howell. People like that. I may break out an automatic weapon from time to time but I’ll always be cooled off at the end of the day to have a chat with Ken Plume. Who am I?

2. I’m a rising action star. Oh crap, that prop gun bullet hurts. I’m a buried rising action star. Who am I?

3. I’ve kept a beard for the better part of three decades and it hasn’t hurt my career one iota. I’ve battled politicians, sharks, and Marsha Mason. Plus, I get to meet Devin Faraci this week! Who am I?

4. Dave Davis finds my sister hot. He’d probably hook up with her in a New York Minute. I wouldn’t be surprised if he liked me too, ’cause monkey see and monkey do! Who am I?

5. I’m a member of Hollywood royalty, and by that I mean my brother is a star. I’m one of those guys who’s lived on the fringe but managed a solid career. We’ve done some good work together too, but where he likes to do big movies and high profile actor pieces I fight aliens while drunk and decide not to be a sheriff when it’s pouring rain. I’m the WHAT? Who am I?