Fantastic Four, when your trailers are pretty much the bottom rung of trailerdom, you’ve got yourself a bit of a problem. Even the inclusion of the TRUE human torch, Jessica Alba (you know, ’cause she’s hot), may not be enough to salvage this one.

This new trailer starts off alright, but about a third in, the crap rock starts and more of the inherent silliness we’ve come to expect from this film begins to fly by with such blazing mediocrity it all becomes so painfully laughable. I’m not even going to mention the absolutely horrible choral music (yeah, they switch it up) ever put to a trailer that plays towards the end (yeah, I guess I did mention it). Ugh.

I feel bad in a way, though. Fantastic Four has become sort of the redheaded step-child of an already sub-par summer movie season (Batman Begins‘ better half notwithstanding), and it hasn’t even been released. Will it make dough? I think so. Not heaps, but possibly enough to warrant a sequel (i.e. The Punisher)… in which case, the only people I should be feeling bad for are you and me. Damn.

I’m getting a bit ahead of myself, though. You be the judge. To watch the trailer…


Hope to eat your own words on our message boards!