Now where was I? Oh yeah…

It really says something about how far gone this whole thing is when I count six different spiderman titles for the month of March and it seems slim. Six? And considering they’re killing ol’ web head in Ultimate well… does this mean that… no. And oh, here now there’s the debut of new Spider-armor in Amazing #656.

Ugh.

You know, I set out to totally tear into Marvel some more but the truth of the matter is I don’t really want to. The piss and vinegar has evaporated after last week’s rant and I’m left wondering whether there is something good coming of all of this rampant saturation of once exciting and classic characters or if this really is just uber marketing and my cynicism is a just cause. One thing is for sure though, if the house of ideas smells interest in a character they will build his/her presence up until by sheer force alone they are a household name. That’s what happened to Deadpool – sure six spidey titles or nine Cap or even three Hulk titles (I see that’s one they’ve parsed down) are a bit exorbitant but four Deadpool titles? This is what happened in the mid-to-late nineties with The Punisher and it killed the character until all the books were canceled, the field cooled off and Garth Ennis came along to re-vamp him. Deadpool worked really well as a drop in-and-out villan/supporting character back in the New Mutant/X-Force days and although I can see there’s room for a bit more… well, lady Deadpool? Because another common ploy at Marvel these days seems to be to take popular characters and render a way to give them tits (hmmmph – x23 anyone?). I know it’s sad that I know so much about this but seriously, I haven’t read mainstream Marvel books in a long time, this is all from the previews – another reason last time I said that each month the solicitous Marvel Previews rag is a source of eye-rolling hilarity for me. And the fun’s not yet done either boys and girls (the vinegar’s coming back) – the hands down winner of the most titles for any one ‘family’ in the marvel universe in the upcoming month of March is, ta da!!! Nineteen, count ‘em, NINETEEN  separate X-titles.

This is the reason that now, for these great characters to ever have a chance to actually be great again, we must look to the silver screen, where the budding Marvel Film Universe has thus far not skipped a beat or made a mistake and the sheer cost of the endeavors to bring the characters to the medium will prevent mass proliferation at the hands of Disney and the shareholders.

For now.

Oh, and just in case you think I’m exaggerating the hilarity or the number, here’s a quick checklist for those nineteen X-books. Betcha can’t eat just one!

Uncanny X-Men 534

Uncanny X-Force 5.1 (huh?)

Uncanny X-Force 6

Uncanny X-Force: The Apocalypse Solution

X-Men 9

Wolverine 7

Wolverine and Jubilee

Wolverine/Hercules

Wolverine: The Best There IS

Daken: Dark Wolverine

X-23 7 & 8

X-Men Legacy 246

New Mutants 23

Age of X Universe

Uncanny X-Men annual 3

X Factor 216 & 217 (so really more than 19 when you figure there’s two of some of these titles)

Namor: The First Mutant 8

Generation Hope 5

Cyclops 1

Iceman & Angel 1

Whewww… Okay, I’m gonna go have a beer and read some Gravel.