I think we all need at least one really nice positive thing about the entertainment business every single day of the year, including weekends. Sometimes it may be something simple, like a video that showcases something fun and sometimes it may be a movie poster that embraces the aesthetic we all want Hollywood to aspire to. Sometimes it may be a long-winded diatribe. Sometimes it’ll be from the staff and extended family of CHUD.com. Maybe even you readers can get in on it. So, take this to the bank. Every day, you will get a little bit of positivity from one column a day here. Take it with you. Maybe it’ll help you through a bad day or give folks some fun things to hunt down in their busy celluloid digesting day.
1.14.11
By David Oliver: Author Page
What I’m Thankful For
The TNA Beautiful People Snatch Cam
Doing a wrestling piece for the MOD earlier this week got me in the mood to continue that trend for WITF. But thinking on the current state of wrestling these days, being that outside of Ring of Honor, it can be a little tough to find some really good wrestling without dealing with a lot of the various bullshit that goes with it. And seeing as how wrestling is an industry that specializes in bullshit to begin with, one can only handle so much of it. For those of you not in the know, the two major American wrestling companies today are the WWE and TNA (Total Nonstop Action). The current WWE is Disneyland wrestling. It’s modern, family-friendly Vegas, after having various periods when it was good, old school, mob-run Vegas. There’s very little that you can’t watch with young kids in their current product, and their storylines and characters generally cater to that.
On the other hand, TNA is very reminiscent of the late ’90s WCW, with the lunacy factor dialed down just a bit. But they’re still more risque than WWE has been in about a decade. In fact, the fans of their new World Heavywight Champion, a guy named Mr. Anderson, are referred to lovingly as “Assholes”. With the ass still in the hole when you hear it chanted on TV. TNA is also a bit of a mess right now. I haven’t watched as much as I used to, but one thing I continually notice is that A) they seem to have too many wrestlers that B) they don’t know how to book (script stories and make matches for) all that well.
In terms of female wrestling, that’s certainly changed from the days of even Wendi Richter, which was only about 25 years ago. Female wrestlers are much like their male counterparts these days: more sculpted and more athletic. And female wrestling outfits have gotten much more functionally user friendly (i.e., tighter, shinier, skimpier), which is frequently a nice bit of all right. Regarding their female wrestlers, known as Divas, WWE is in the same boat TNA is with their male talent: a few too many that they don’t always book well. TNA’s female talent are called ” Knockouts” and you’ll usually find that the quality of the female wrestling is better than in WWE.
Now call it the old school wrestling fan hedonist in moi, but I’m one who can appreciate a certain degree of trashiness with female wrestling. Goes with the territory. And right now, the trashiest female wrestlers in either TNA or WWE are a group called The Beautiful People. The roster fluctuates, but basically, TBP consist of Angelina Love, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne and Lacey Von Erich, the daughter of late wrestling great, Kerry Von Erich. This foursome are all very athletic and buxom (very safe to say not naturally so) and the uniform that was settled on by a couple of them regularly were these technicolor latex S&M deals that basically looked sprayed on. Their entrance music is this trashy, strip club kind of tune and they’re all good at playing up the bad girl personae, even when they’re good bad girls.
But the thing that really distinguishes TBP is their ring entrance. There are two words that perfectly describe it: Snatch Cam. Basically, the members of TBP start out at the top of the ramp. The turn away from the crowd, bend over and then rise temptingly, all about the ass. Then they walk down to the ring in the aforementioned skimpiness they’re almost wearing. They climb up onto the ring apron, bend over between the top and middle ropes and tease a girl on girl kiss. Then…they stop. Cue the Club MTV low camera angle as TBP point to their posteriors. The cameraman moves in for the extreme close up and there you have it: screenfullosnatch. It’s about five to ten seconds of Skinemax on a wrestling show. The first time I saw it I thought TNA had switched over to the Playboy Channel. I’m still a little surprised it’s on TV. But as someone who still appreciates a bit of the mob’s Vegas, I ain’t complaining.
It is without a doubt, the best ring entrance in wrestling.