You know what I’m watching right now? Porn. What are you watching? I’m at my uncle’s lake house. And my uncle gets porn. It seems unbecoming of a man (or should I say unbecumming) to not watch it. And here I am, watching True Blood at my uncle’s house. Or at least I was. Now it’s porn. It doesn’t appear to be a bad show, but if I wanted to, I’d create the Garbage Pail Kids in a Christian image. I’m sure there’s a movement going on now for them, but fuck those guys. I played Dark Earth. It didn’t pay off (these are jokes that would work with both the nerdiest of your kind and the worst). Don’t include me.
So, yeah, porn’s playing right now. Penis in and out of vagina. “Devin,” you might say, “What is your favorite vagina to be in?” Well, I’ve only been in one. It was fun for the time being. Also, the Mt. Vesuvius ride was aces. Take your vagina from my prebucesenct angst. In retrospect, teenage vagina is where its at.