is the trailer that played during the woefully underseen Grindhouse,
introducing us to the character of Machete.

This is a joke
trailer that Robert Rodriguez released for Cinco de Mayo, while a
feature-length movie based on the above trailer was in production.

And here
is a trailer for Machete just released today.

One of these things is not like the other.

The first two trailers showed us a sleaze-tastic good time, filled
with hot women, unapologetic action and topical racial humor. But the
third one… well, there might be something interesting there, but I can
barely see it through the bland dialogue, the boring title cards and
the nauseating camera tricks.

Seriously, Rodriguez, what happened? Who thought that the best way to
show off a movie would be through slowing down, blurring, rotating
and/or repeating every shot? What idiot thought that this trailer was
fit for public release? Is this trailer representative of the movie as a
whole and if so, can I ask for my money back in advance?

Look, I’m not unreasonable. I know that the first mainstream trailer
had to be considerably cleaner and more PC than the first two. But is
this movie so racy, mature and potentially controversial that the only
way to get the green band was to make it unwatchable? No possible way.

Believe it or not, there are still plenty of movie fans out there who
have fond memories of Grindhouse. We’ve been waiting a long time
for this, Rodriguez. Don’t fuck it up.

Machete is set for release this September 3rd.