
Originally Posted in 2008
Featured Writers: Nick Nunziata

Day One: Legend of Dinosaurs and Monster Birds
If I Ran The Marketing: “Maybe we should bomb Japan once more, just to be sure.”

Day Two: Space Amoeba
If I Ran the Marketing: “You will believe giant crabs, squids, and turtles can barely function!”

Day Three: Monster From A Prehistoric Planet
If I Ran the Marketing: “Ever been pelted by stones thrown by Jesus?”

Day Four: Yongary, Monster From the Deep
If I Ran the Marketing: “Put your memories of Godzilla in your ass and shit them onto your daughter’s chest!”

Day Five: Attack of the Monsters
If I Ran the Marketing: “Someone just puked on your hands!”

Day Six: Destroy All Planets
If I Ran the Marketing: “I Fucked Your Father Through Your Mother!”

Day Seven: Frankenstein Conquers the World
If I Ran the Marketing: “Watch Two Large Pussies Fail At Everything They Try!”

Day Eight: Q The Winged Serpent
If I Ran the Marketing: “You’ll Die Knowing Nothing About Aztec Gods!”

Day Nine: The Three Worlds of Gulliver
If I Ran the Marketing: “You Know What? FUCK GULLIVER.”

Day Ten: The Giant Claw
If I Ran the Marketing: “They Didn’t Even Have The Enthusiasm To Add Punctuation To Their Tagline!”
