It’s no secret that CHUD has entered a new era. We’re moving forward and growing by leaps and bounds and we’ve already started bringing you the awesome with more surprises in store. But, while we’re all for celebrating the long life of the New Flesh, it never hurts to take a look back and celebrate the things we’ve done in the past. Things like Lists. They’re a tremendous part of CHUD’s identity and we’ve lost count of how many of you guys have cited them as the reason you got on board with us in the first place. We’ve done a lot of them – some forgotten, some still mentioned in almost every forum discussion – all of them fun. So we’re bringing them back. And what better time than now that our first list under the new regime is well under-way? So – every Friday we’ll publish a freshly-put-together index of every list we’ve ever done – our Remastered Special Editions, if you will. Plus, we’ll have a few surprises along the way. So, without further ado…
The 100 Best Bastards
Originally Published in 2005
Featured Writers: Nick Nunziata, Kirby Drummond, Dave Davis, Newell Todd, George Merchan, Dan Whitehead
It’s been a good long time since we did a CHUD List, having tackled Underdog movies, Kills, and other stuff in our past either here or in the long dead MOVIE INSIDER magazine. Well, we’re back because we know how much fun they are to read and how great the discussion is for these things. I’ve opened up the books a little, allowing for a sort of “CHUD List Academy” to be formed, a conglomerate whose participants will change from list to list. Some names will be familiar, some won’t. The end result will be something fun and sure to piss some of you off while making others say “that’s just how I’d have done it”. So, enjoy this first blast of 25 (out of 100, in no particular order) of the BEST BASTARDS IN FILM.Note: Some Entries may contain spoilers. You’ve been warned.Day One: 100 – 75A Perfect Bastard Moment: You’ve got a barely dressed Kelly LeBrock roaming the house, and what is Chet’s response? ‘I’m gonna tell Mom and Dad everything.” Asshole. Bastard bastard asshole.
Day Two: 74 – 50
A Perfect Bastard Moment: “That bitch was bleeding, dude. When I first put it in, she all screamed all loud and then like’ I think I saw her bite down on a pillow, but I don’t know.”
Day Three: 49 – 26
A Perfect Bastard Moment: When he stomps on that Japanese guy. You know who I’m talking about.
Day Four: 25 – 1
A Perfect Bastard Moment: Oh, I don’t know… could putting a gun to your own child’s head be one of them?
Discuss these motherfuckers on our message boards
And for a peek at next week’s rebirth: