11. But how did they find the first floor?
“This is a beautiful home. I couldn’t help but notice there were windows above the windows in the room.”
“How would one possibly see if there are rooms attached to those windows?”
“Wow! What are those jagged rectangles of wood ascending up the hallway there?”
12. This person needs a chauffeur. Is Henri Paul available?
Photo by John Makarewicz.
For some reason this is even more infuriating than the rest of the infuriating Twilight bullshit. Which is no easy feat.
13. Decades of progress. And now this.
Photo by Joshua Ewald.
This person actually fucking exists. This isn’t something from an outtake of Eastbound and Down or something. This. Actually. Exists. This person shares the world with you. Know that and then pray for a swift apocalypse.
14. XLNURD.
Photo
by Joshua Ewald.
There’s no real good time to proclaim your love for DC Villains, but when you’ve done well enough for yourself to afford an ill-colored Lexus perhaps it’s time to enjoy what you’ve attained and not draw attention to yourself.
15. Truth in Advertising.
Photo by Mike DiGrazia.
I want to know what the chef’s regular lies are like too.
16. For all of us who like to cut shit in the dark.
Photo by Nick Nunziata.
I jest, but just the other day I was trying to cut a recipe out of a magazine printed on a black hole and couldn’t.
17. WHOSE Favorites?
Photo by Nick Nunziata.
“I’m looking for a new genre to blow my chops away and enhance my diverse love of film!”
18. Well, who’d know better than him I suppose…
Photo by Nick Nunziata.
Lou’s a good guy and I’m not trying to make an example of him. This is about Facebook’s idiocy about some things.
Please… Please… Please don’t allow for people to be the ones who send ‘LIKE’ requests on themselves. Regardless of the intent it makes folks look conceited in a not good way. It’s just a damn dumb policy. With that said, you should go ‘like’ Lou Tambone.
19. Goes great with a child’s coffin.
Photo by Nick Nunziata.
There’s an unsettling lack of enthusiasm with this pancake and it scares me. I think the cold and utter disdain for a child’s happiness is evident in every cranny of this solemn dead-eyed foodbear. The blood puddle or “nose” seals the deal and guarantees that this meal is laced with a heavy narcotic so that when the child eats it, they will soon be unconscious and ready to be dragged through the kitchen into the destruction chamber where they are lovely boned until there is no more of them.
This is the officially endorsed food product from that scene in Running Scared.
20. The Official Movie Tie-In for ‘What’s Love Got to Do With It?’.
Photo by Nick Nunziata.
That’s all I got. A wife beating joke…
AND THAT’S ALL I NEED!
You think we’re done? WHAT ABOUT THE NEXT PAGE?