If there is one thing I enjoy doing above all others its going to the movie theatre. I love it so much that I very often go by myself. There is just something so cool to me about going to watch a movie in a big dark room, with a large screen and high wattage sound.

Like any other or at least most theatre goers, I like interupptions to be as minimal as possible. For those people that like to text or have conference calls during my movie, I want to break their phone. For those that eat popcorn as if they are a cow, I hope that they choke. For those 20 rows behind me that are making out, please just keep it quiet and don’t get anything on me! These are just a few of the issues I have at theatres, and is cheifly why I like to go during the middle of the afternoon on a Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday when crowds are usually smaller. That’s not to say I don’t like the big crowds, as I have had my fair share of midnight screenings and waiting in lines for multiple hours to see a movie “first”. But when the viewing is not an “event”, I prefer more serene viewing experiences.

My newest pet peeve comes from watching “kids” movies at the theatre. Now, I understand that many feel that going to one of these films is like asking for distraction. But the kids don’t bother me at all! I know that they will be talking here and there and even sometimes running around the theatre. What really irks me and annoys me to no end, are their parents. Whether it is the whimpering, laugh at anything mother or the talk through the film, yet tell the kid to be quiet father, I can’t stand them! YOU ARE WORSE THAN YOUR KID!!

During my most recent viewing of “How to Train Your Dragon” and a viewing of “Up” last year, I had woman sitting behind me that for all I know could have been the same! The incessant “oohs” and “aahs” and the most annoying giggles had me wanting to gag the girl. I get it, the films are cute and have funny moments, but seriously, every thrity seconds you have to make a noise?!? But if that wasn’t bad enough, during “How to Train Your Dragon”, I had a father that kept telling his kids to quiet down (which by the way, there were making hardly any noise). But after telling them to quiet down, he would talk to his wife and give small bits of commentary. Are you serious?!? Do you not see yourself as the “bad guy” here? It’s almost as if these parents come to see the movie and try to A) like and enjoy the film by responding vocally to everything, B) try and keep there kids interested in the film by showing over the top interest, or C) both. Look, people for years have been able to enjoy films without being over the top as to really cause annoyance to other movie goers. Granted there are times that vocal reactions are spontaneous and I accept those. But just to be vocal to be vocal has no place.

Perhaps I’m being a little selfish and condescending. I don’t have kids so I guess I don’t know what I’m talking about. But what I do know is that having the whimpering and cooing of a grown woman in your ear for 2 hours is not fun!