think we all need at least one really nice positive thing about the
entertainment business every single day of the year, including weekends.
Sometimes it may be something simple, like a video that showcases
something fun and sometimes it may be a movie poster that embraces the
aesthetic we all want Hollywood to aspire to. Sometimes it may be a
long-winded diatribe. Sometimes it’ll be from the staff and extended
family of CHUD.com. Maybe even you readers can get in on it. So, take
this to the bank. Every day, you will get a little bit of positivity
from one column a day here. Take it with you. Maybe it’ll help you
through a bad day or give folks some fun things to hunt down in their
busy celluloid digesting day.
By Jason David Rhodes (Reader Submission!)
What I’m Thankful For:
magically becoming a Japanese Chairman on Iron Chef America, Mark Dacascos was a
super-powered, cyborg mixed-martial-arts killing machine with a
Bratz, Kadeem Hardison was a surprisingly durable down-and-out songwriter
at the wrong place, at… wait for it… the wrong time.
smallest roles on one of the most hated episodes of Lost, John
Pyper-Ferguson managed to deliver one of my favorite non-sequiters of all time:
“Well, if it ain’t my favorite cheese-eatin’ Dick Monkey”*
Britney Murphy played a jailbaitey motel manager with a wonderbra and some form
of mild retardation.
as sarcasm, but here’s the thing: this movie works! The fights
are varied and creative, the stunts are painful, the banter is fun, and there
are some genuine laughs. I have a difficult time remembering a theatrical
action movie in recent years that has lived up to the standard set by this
late-night cable catch. It is a perennial non-guilty pleasure of
Dacascos). Some fight scenes. By chance he meets Malik (Hardison).
Some more fight scenes. By chance they meet Deliverance (Murphy). Some
more fight scenes / shit blows up. Big fight scene in a techno-club with
motorcycles, whips, and shit blows up. And that’s pretty much it, aside
from the tre 90’s credits song, which continuously asks where the party is at,
but never gives us the answer, but will remain stuck in your head for the next
seven days while you ponder it.
certainly doesn’t do every stunt here, but the ones he does do are
impressive. Kadeem Hardison comes off as effortless and likable, and
barely legal Britney Murphy is at the apex of her arc from
crazy weird to weirdly hot.
cleary emulating – you need to check this out in a non-Youtube capacity on
your big screen with the sound turned way up. And for those still
unconvinced, Tracey Walter is in it. Tracey Walter, bitches.