I’ve put a lot of thought into this, and I know I’m running almost a month late, but here we go:

1. Fork
2. Spoon
3. Knife

I’m a little surprised with myself that Spoon took Knife this year. I don’t think anyone can argue the merits of Fork (it is, in the worlds of my colleague Jeremy, undeniable), though.

*Late Update: Some questioned my lack of chopsticks, but it was a 2006 utensil due to festival playings. Those who noted my lack of Sporks should not question the absence. It was, as the Dutch say, intentional.