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03/13 – He’s gonna love his sign when he sees it. Oh.

Photo by Nick Nunziata.

I think most of the folks driving cars have discovered that pedestrians of most shapes and sizes and creeds are to not be run over. Except that one Armenian guy who’s fair game, but otherwise…

Thing is, the sign could have said anything. Or, it could have at least had clip art that would indicate a dude was blind rather than just a picture of a dude crossing the street. That’s prejudiced against us people who look like that but love to look at shit all day. Give him a cane. Or a dog. Or have the figure awkwardly grasping around. Or have it pointing furiously at its peepers. Or have a clip art of a guy whose other senses are a lot better. Like, he can hear the fuck out of sound. When he touches something, he can tell what it ate for lunch. When it rains, he can see Jennifer Garner’s face.

Or have the sign read: “Some blind people here. Don’t run them over.”

The person the sign is meant to protect is not going to be spellchecking it.

When I was a kid we used to go trout fishing in the mountains and pass a sign in the boonies that read “SLOW DEAF CHILDREN AT PLAY” and it gave me pause. Man, talk about the short straw. Slow AND Deaf. At least they were able to enjoy themselves. I hope they did. The sign went away abruptly, and I worried that maybe someone disobeyed the sign and ran the daylights over them.

“Well they died doing what they loved, playing near the street silently and inert.”

Well, they could have made noise because deaf kids can PRODUCE sound. They just can’t experience it. Maybe I deserve a sign too.

By the way, the point of this article was not to poke fun at those less fortunate than myself though I did milk it [OK, I poked a little]. It’s just that signs like this always earn a double take.

Or maybe I read it COMPLETELY wrong and around the corner there’s a gym where all these athletes are blindly doing Performance Enhancing Drugs without realizing the horse tranquilizer they’re having injected into their nerve cluster might be bad for them. If so, then I apologize.