I’m not going to lie, I fucked shit up so bad last night, I’ve just hired some “helpers” to fuck it back down. Consult your doctor if you can hire them as well.


So some people think that Paranormal Activity (going wide) can take Saw VI. I don’t buy it. It may be close, but Saw fans have become hardcore. I can’t really defend the series, but I see that as I grew up on Nightmare on Elm Street films, which would come out almost yearly, that there is something to seeing a franchise that is your own, that becomes a habit. These films have been opening to $30 Million, why not with this film?

Regardless, Paranormal Activity is the horror film of the year. There’s something about denying the audience a visual in that I think is truly terrifying. Having no voice in the storytelling can create a greater sense of terror.

Astro Boy was a trouble production and will die quick. Ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone. And unless The Vampire’s Assistant has a huge ass following, it’s of the class of Young Adult lit that has been transferred to the screen, which is that it’ll likely trip. Amelia has been eviscerated by critics, and Hillary Swank has not built a relationship with audiences. Sex Bo-o-o-mb. Or whatever. The picture was made for Oscars, but if Fox thought they had something, it wouldn’t have this release. The umpire calls it a strike picture.

So let’s work for the weekend, while everyone goes off the deep end:

1. Saw VI - $29.5 Million
2. Paranormal Activity - $20 Million
3. Where the Wild Things Are - $17.5 Million
4. Law Abiding Citizen – $12 Million
5. Astro Boy – $9.5 Million

And then SUNDAY I will put my dick in the mashed potatoes, if they’ve cooled enough to prevent third degree burns.