Just when you thought it was safe to resume your life after the horrors visited upon us all in this summer’s Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, sources are reporting that the madmen behind that travesty are preparing to strike again. According to a source code named ‘Nelson’ famed cinematic terrorist Michael Bay is meeting with his henchman Ehren Kruger and the secretly villainous Steven Spielberg to hash out Transformers 3.

In a dispatch on Bay’s website, timed to strike the most fear in the hearts of decent movie-loving Americans, Nelson had this to say:

I spoke to Michael today and he had a little update on his future projects:

  • He
    will be meeting later this week with Steven Spielberg, and Ehren Kruger
    to discuss ideas for Transformers 3. By the end of the week he should
    have an idea if Transformers 3 will hit your local cineplex in the
    summer of 2011 or 2012.
  • In the meantime “Pain & Gain” is looking very possible as is…
  • …Bad Boys 3. Either film coming to a theater near you before or after Transformers 3.

So this week, in a bunker somewhere in Los Angeles (I bet Santa Monica), these three will be meeting to decide our very futures. It could be a good outcome – Pain & Gain is based on the magazine article you’ll find linked above, about outlaw body builders. And then there’s Bad Boys 3, which could make up for some of the pain of Revenge of the Fallen. But always, constantly, looms the threat of Transformers 3.

The only positive is that maybe Spielberg will be more involved. Chatter on terrorist lines indicates that Bay was acting largely outside of Spielberg’s purview on the horrible Revenge of the Fallen; perhaps the statesman will reign in the firebrand. We can only hope.