Yesterday MTV was able to confirm that Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Sylvester Stallone will indeed share celluloid in at least one scene in upcoming action-fuckstravaganza The Expendables. Cue some people’s shit exploding.

So, to recap, one more time:







Sylvester “Beef” Stallone
Bruce “Bald Bastard” Willis
Arnold “Explode” Schwarzenegger
Jason “Crankin‘…” Statham
Jet “Small” Li
Mickey “Face” Rourke
Dolph “The Interview” Lundgren
Steve “Hasn’t Killed His Whole Family” Austin
Terry “Thought Your Head Would Be Bigger” Crews
Randy “Joke” Couture
Brittany “Riding In Cars With MEN Now” Murphy



…it’s a veritable Ocean’s 12 of muscle, testosterone, ass-handing skill, and pain.

/Film has Willis taking the role of “Mr. Church,” who apparently contracts the mercenaries to complete their mission in the first place. This is apparently the (somewhat larger) role that Ah-nold was offered, but declined in favor of a more schedule friendly cameo.

The Expendables is almost entirely shot, so hopefully some kind of trailer or other look at this madness will emerge soon. Keep your eyes peeled and check your local gun shows often…

UPDATE: Thanks to Board Member Casey Moore (who actually worked on this movie) for pointing out that Brittany Murphy never ended up actually being a part of the film. Whatever, I’m leaving the joke.

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