There’s not going to be another Unbreakable. Let me just get that out of the way. No matter what people say, any news about future Unbreakable movies is horse ass, because all Unbreakable is to M. Night Shyamalan is a bargaining chit to get the fanboys perked up. To remind him he’s not just the guy who took big shits on America with Lady in the Water, The Happening, and The Village. Every year it seems that the rapidly diminishing auteur pops word about future movies starring Security and Mr. Glass, and every year sites like this one say “Hey look, M. Night Shyalaman is talking about Unbreakable again.“.

Well he is.

MTV has reported that M. Night Shyamalan is working towards revisiting his sneaky superhero movie from 2000. He’s also combing through a box of old VHS tapes for more of his Spielbergian home movies. Seriously, they’re just as good as Lionel Spielberg’s feature filme ouvre.

While I have no doubt that he can get financing if both Samuel L. Jackson and Bruce Willis commit to it, I think the reality is that the film wasn’t a big hit and is overshadowed by Horrible Handheld: The Movie [known here as The Sixth Sense] and Water Wins Everything [working title: Signs]. Unbreakable was a really good movie I am deathly afraid of watching. There’s no way it’s as good as I remember. It can’t be. I’ll keep it sweet in my memories…

So, nope… it’s a crock. M. Night just needs to keep whatever little pieces of zeitgeist he has accrued alive and kicking while he prepares for his sellout… I mean kid’s movie The Last Airbender to happening to us.

Also, Bruce Willis and Samuel L. Jackson are tired. Tired of making interesting movies and tired of being good in the bad ones..