Contributing sources: The internet


As
much TV as you think you watch, Uncle Mitch watches more. 
With beer in hand at all times.  He’s a mythological figure
and a great source of fun and special times.  At any given
time, his blood alcohol level is somewhere around the ratings for
American Idol.  But that doesn’t stop this drunk bitch from
sharing his insights on the week’s TV news.




Mr. Demi Moore raced to victory over CNN in a competition to be the first Twitter account to reach one million followers. 

Uncle Mitch’s Take: Convenient how CNN didn’t mention that Fox News Channel had roughly the population of China on their account…



After 30 years as an animated NFL analyst, John Madden is calling it quits.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: Am I the only one that thinks Collinsworth ’09 for Xbox 360 is gonna be the smarmiest football game out there?



The Working Girl is set to guest star on the plastic surgery drama as the mother of Kelly Carlson’s Kimber.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: Hey, I’m all for plastic surgery.  I mean, goddamn if those ain’t the best before-and-after pics I’ve ever seen…





While discussing his reactions to his ex-wife dating a 19-year-old, former wrestler Hulk Hogan says he sympathizes with what O.J. did in committing murder.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: He even had Macho Man all set to drive the Bronco…



Former Cosby Show child star has just landed a deal for her own reality show with boyfriend Kaseem Penn on the Oxygen Network.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: On the pilot episode they beat the shit out of Raven-Symone.



Susan Boyle wowed the crowd and Simon Cowell on UK TV show, Britain’s Got Talent and has become an overnight worldwide star as a result.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: I think I’ve got synesthesia or something.  I heard her sing and my eyes started bleeding.





The former Atlanta Falcons quarterback has been in talks with producers about a show that would follow him as he’s released from federal custody and attempts to atone for his past.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: He could start by booking a death match between a pit bull and Dog The Bounty Hunter.


Matthew Perry Embarrassed By Shyamalan Mistaken Identity


On The Late Show With David Letterman, the former Friends star recounted a time when, after spending an entire evening socializing with M. Night Shyamalan, he was shocked to realize the man was a look-alike and not the noted Sixth Sense director.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: Then after seeing Signs, The Village, Lady In The Water and The Happening, he was thankful.


On a CNN.com political blog, the staunch Republican and former Walker, Texas Ranger star said he’d want to run for the office of President of Texas if the state seceded from the union.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: Any chance we could clone Bruce Lee to kick his again?





The teen heartthrob said that he prefers hanging out with his grandmother rather than engaging in the typical young Hollywood nightclub scene.

Uncle Mitch’s Take: That was until the naked pics she sent him ended up on the internet.