What will Ridley Scott’s Monopoly movie actually be about? Do yourself a favor and don’t ask, since nobody seems to really know. Here’s what executive producer and Hasbro CEO Brian Goldner had to say to MTV about it: “The whole world is about the financial markets. You can’t turn on the news today without understanding the
financial markets and what’s going on out there.

“[Ridley Scott]’s built these great big worlds of imagination. Combine that with Pamela Pettler who’s writing this great
script about real people kind of playing a real-life game of
‘Monopoly,’ not the board game, although they’re icons of the game. And
then you really get the idea why this story could make sense right

I don’t get why this story makes sense AT ALL. They’re not playing the board game, but they’re playing a game and they’re the icons of the game? They’re a dog and a shoe? Seriously, I don’t get the idea of what you’re even talking about, Goldner.

Maybe Ridley Scott could clear it up.

“We have identified a pretty good story and it is fundamentally a movie, not a game, probably describing in a way the characters in the film, the passion of the game, and how the game came about.”

I guess he can’t. Is Scott telling the story of coming up with the board game? But didn’t he say this would be science fictiony? Is this the story of people playing Monopoly in the real world on a grand scale – like they’re really building hotels willy nilly everywhere, and charging each other ‘rent’ for walking down their streets?

The only thing that I can really grok from all of this is that it sounds totally fucking ridiculous.