STUDIO: Koch Lorber
MSRP: $29.98
RATED: Not Rated
RUNNING TIME: 91 minutes
• Outtakes

• Trailer

The Pitch

Lagerfeld is a bitch with gangster style. Let him make you a dress.

The Humans

Nicole Kidman, Karl Lagerfeld and Princess Caroline of Monaco

The Nutshell

Karl Lagerfeld is the number one designer at Chanel. He jets around the world in his private jet, as he decides which houses to help resurrect. Hell, they even make reference to him selling a clothing line based upon his face. That’s kind of fucked up when you think about it. But, what part of the fashion world isn’t ripe for parody?

Romero just isn’t trying anymore.

The Lowdown

Lagerfeld Confidential is a documentary that takes a look at what happens to ego unchecked. Does Lagerfeld ever pay for his transgressions? No. He just goes on about how he likes prostitution and hates gay marriage. All the while, only passing mentions are made to his homosexual relationships.

It’s time for some fast finger felt fucking action.

Lagerfeld Confidential is made of moments where we get to see what perceived power the designer holds over others. A gallery of assorted garment handlers follow his every word. Celebrities such as Nicole Kidman are shushed when Lagerfeld enters the room. Everyone loves him and nobody speaks an unkind word. In a word, it’s bullshit.

Three years later, this small child will have fisted Eleanor Roosevelt. His name? Frank Stallone.

The rest of the film is played out in an assortment of parties and gala events. Nobody bothers to ask any heavy questions. Lagerfeld just prances in front of the camera and continues to do his work. All the while, he looks like some gay priest. It’s bizarre, yet incredibly fascinating.

Too poor for Liberace. Too rich for Andy Dick.

Lagerfeld Confidential
  is a documentary that doesn’t really document anything. We get to experience a controlled look at a man who doesn’t live in the real world. Nobody asks about his past successes, as you probably wouldn’t get a real answer. Everything is tainted by this vision of his design. There’s no substance and there’s no material. There’s just Lagerfeld.

Behind the Scenes of The Timewaster Letters.

The Package

has a pretty strong transfer with no audio dropout. The special
features are a trailer and some outtakes. The entire film feels like it was made out of B-Reel, so who needs outtakes? It’s kind of pointless and makes you feel like you wasted your time. But, what are you going to do? I say avoid it.

1.0 out of 10