Before you get excited about the adaptation of your very favorite underwater beefcake tome (sexy image to the right taken from Russ Fischer’s bookshelf), the news of Atlantis Rising hitting screens under the Beckinsale-assisted and calloused hands of Len Wiseman comes with the incredible caveat of being THE COMIC BOOK Atlantis Rising and not Alyssa Day’s Pulitzer-snubbed written work.

Speaking of the book pictured to the right, what are the odds we find out that the ripped gentleman on the cover is named Atlantis and the title refers to when he activates his massive sex?

Platinum Studios is a juggernaut at getting movie deals for comic books you’ve never seen, and Atlantis Rising is simply the latest. Cowboys and Aliens, which we’ve seemingly been reporting since the internet was a mote in Plato’s eye, continues to threaten us with its existence as A-listers jump on board like hungry fleas. Read the comic?

Didn’t think so.

The plot of this latest property involves Atlantis rising.

J.J. Abrams alums and Jazz dialogue writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman are producing while Len Wiseman directs and produces while Platinum’s Scott Mitchell Rosenberg produces while the comic languishes next to Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and Ramon Estevez on the vaporware loveseat.

Discover all the mysteries of Atlantis Rising here while bundling up to get in your Atlantis Rising line outside your local multiplex.

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