The absolute worst horror series in existence shows no sign of slowing down. Saw V really is being released, defying all logic and reason. It makes me weep, it really does. You know how many great horror films don’t even get a theatrical release, when garbage like this keeps getting pumped out year after year? If you know someone who went to Saw IV in theaters, give them a punch in the neck from me.

Anyway, a teaser trailer for the film hit Comic Con this weekend, and we were sent it, so you’re going to have to watch it too. Check it out.

What a shitty fucking teaser trailer, eh? “OMG, he’s stuck in a trap! Was that Jigsaw!?!!>111!!” Cut it faster, editor! No one will know what’s going on and be scared for no reason! Put some “SHINK!” noises in there too! The kids love that crap. Change up that lighting and keep those strange camera angles coming- people won’t know what to expect!

I’ll be honest, I haven’t watched Saw III or IV. I’ve got them sitting right here next to my desk, still shrink wrapped, and I planned on one day getting very drunk and watching both in a row for a review, possibly calling it “A NIGHT OF PAIN” or something similar. But there’s so very many other movies out there, and the first two just absolutely bent me over and let me have it. I won’t get taken again, unless it’s for a good reason (or for your enjoyment).

Saw V hits theaters on October 24th, because as everyone knows, if it’s Halloween, it must be mediocre horror films.