Thank God there’s another zombie movie being put into some state of development! I was a little worried. It had been a few days since the last one. Better yet, a horror luminary is doing the script and by horror luminary I mean one of the people running Family Guy.

Horror has a new name and it is Go Fuck Yourself.

Better yet, this project not just zombies but zombies AND vampires! That’s actually really on point since there are no two other mythological beings more overexposed than those two unliving assholes. Speaking of mythological beings, GOD. No existing supreme being could allow for this madness. The plot involves humans escaping zombies only to be protected by vampires, who fend off the zombies to maintain their blinking man-shaped Capri Suns. In my dreams this uneasy alliance is further complicated by mollusks who only eat vampires being chased into camp by demons who only eat mollusks. The last hour and a half is one long Mexican standoff of hunger.

The details you are surely drooling over are as follows: David A. Goodman (not any more!), best known for being a bigwig on Family Guy is writing the adaptation of Blatant Comics’ Last Blood, a comic which surely must dwell outside the Rambo multiverse. The comic is written by Chris Crosby and Bobby Crosby. That is not the Bobby Crosby who plays for the Oakland A’s because he is too busy getting injured all the time and spending his millions to sit down and envision a scenario where vampires befriend their food.

Blatant Comics. Apt. You can read the comic right here if you so choose.

Note: The original comic book is drawn by Owen Gieni, a nice chap who actually draws two of my comics (Hell’s Garrison & Valhalla), though neither is really anywhere near being finished so I can’t talk about how awesome they are because it’s likely they’ll take six years to finish. Sorry Owen, you are simply collateral damage. I hope you get some of the green stuff thrown your way, sir.

Note Two: Fuck zombies.

Note Three: Fuck the next thirty zombie related trade breaks.

Note Four: I’m sure the Crosby Brothers are excellent people who had no idea every film ever made in Hollywood from the Zoetrope to this past Thursday was a zombie film.