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PLATFORM: Wii
MSRP: $29.99
ESRB RATING: E
PUBLISHER: Majesco Games
DEVELOPER: Super X Stories

The Pitch

Africa’s famed Serengeti National Park plays host to your photography safari. Take pictures of things that would kill you and not think twice about it.

The Play

Majesco has created a game that tries to teach children about the natural world. The scenic beauty and sounds of Africa are captured in a game that tries its hard to educate. It’s just a shame that all eleven levels of the photography based levels don’t try to entertain. It seems that Majesco and Super X noticed the problem and they introduced arcade stages that can be unlocked by beating levels and specific goals. That’s right, people. You too can thrill to the excitement of hosing down animals on a timer.

If that wasn’t enough, you’ve got to put up with this hippie bullshit impact meter. Getting too close to animals, attacking them or causing them to break a nail will disturb the impact meter. The rumble in the Wiimote will start to go nuts and you’ll start blowing shots. After eighty times of doing this, you will fail the mission. So, if you’ve got a four year old with boundary issues, little Timmy won’t have that bad of a learning curve on this game.

The Presentation

The game looks and sounds decent. The World Music label Taking Drum Records was brought in to record the unique score that accompanies the game. The low polygon count and the bizarre framerate keeps this title from being a looker on Wii. Hell, I’d go so far as to say it looks on par with the Wii launch titles. But, if we’re going to break balls about it…most Wii games look on par with the Wii launch games.

The Replay

There simply is no reason to replay this game. I beat the game in under six hours, never missing a single goal in the game. The unlocked arcade games provide little reason or need for a second trip. Then, there’s the frustration factor. You will walk into more invisible walls and barriers in the first twenty minutes of this game than the entirety of Lost: Via Domus.

If that wasn’t enough, there’s the basic gameplay that just pissed me off. Spending hours taking pictures of random creatures with your Wiimote isn’t exciting. There’s nothing to a game based around on taking pictures of elephant shit and frogs. I’m insulted that they even thought there was a market for this. Now, Cabela understands the kind of game I’m looking to play. Maybe, we can get Cabela to handle a similar themed title minus the lame photography.

The Verdict

Wild Earth: African Safari means well. It’s just that well meaning and entertainment don’t go hand-in-hand. Children that have an interest in animals will only put up with not doing anything for about an hour. Afterwards, they’ll flip this crap off and take turns kicking my ass on Grand Theft Auto IV multiplayer. This is one of the lamest games that I’ve had to play in 2008.

2.5 out of 10