I still don’t quite believe this story because it is too wonderful to be true, but since Billboard believes (and they just had Iron Maiden on the cover, man) I’m going to pretend this might at least have a chance of being real.

How do I put this…OK, the company that owns most of Hall and Oates’ big hits is shopping a cartoon called J-Stache in which John Oates and his mustache are reunited to rock and (one hopes) fight crime. Dave Attell will voice the ‘stache.

Here’s part of the pilot plot, which features Oates opening a new arm of the Rock  and Roll Hall of Fame to highlight mustachioed musicians:

Suddenly, a dying David Crosby appears and with his last breath warns Oates of a mysterious secret group of mustache wearers bent on killing other mustache wearers. As actor Tom Selleck attempts to escape from the latest murder scene, Oates summons his own mustache with a fist pump that simultaneously changes his clothes from conservative attire to pink pants and white boots.

The pilot has been storyboarded (done exclusively with those toy sketch pads that use metal filings and a magnet ‘pen’ if I had my way) and could be produced within the next two months, after which creative director Evan Duby says they could shop it either to network, or use the web as a stepping stone to network.

Douchebag hipster bait? 100% Possibly very funny? Also true. And all this being the case, why isn’t your pilot greenlit yet? What’s wrong with you? We’ve told you to stop shaving for years.