A part of me would like to go all Robin Sandza on the Fox lot this morning, but there is an upside to the studio’s decision to remake Brian De Palma’s The Fury: they’ll have to upgrade the title to Blu-Ray!

Then again, that’s only if the film goes forward. Right now, it’s just in the scripting stage with the rookie duo of Brian McGreevy and Lee Shipman, who wrote the Black List-ed Of Every Wickedness (about America’s first serial killer). Whether they plan to go back to John Farris’s novel or simply cut-and-paste the author’s screenplay (ala The Omen ’06, which was so unoriginal, the WGA gave sole credit to David Seltzer), it’s not like they’ll have name-brand recognition on their side; The Fury was a box office disappointment in 1978, and hasn’t acquired much of a following outside of De Palma-philes. One lasting impression: the movie really blew up John Cassavetes for younger filmgoers.

Though they’re calling The New Fury a “contemporary reimagining”, they’re sticking with the basic premise: young man with frightening telekinetic powers gets kidnapped by the U.S. government, which plans to exploit his ability. Since the studio (and producer Ted Field) will likely want to appeal to the teenage demographic, I’ve a feeling they’ll play up the romantic possibilities of the telepathic connection between Robin and Gillian while jettisoning the old-man-looking-for-his-son device.

And unless they hire De Palma to remake his own movie, I can guarantee you they’ll have nothing this deliriously cinematic.

It’s our loss that De Palma never hooked up with John Williams again.

As I’ve said in the past, The Fury is a movie drunk on the power of the medium. This redo strikes me as a quick cash-in. No offense to McGreevy and Shipman, but even if they bang out an excellent screenplay, Fox will most assuredly fuck it up. It’s what they do.