I admire a man who follows up his attention-getting debut feature with a giant crocodile movie. That takes some moxie. And while Greg Mclean may never be taken seriously again as a result, at least he’ll have Rogue to fall back on.

Truth be told, I didn’t think much of his first movie, Wolf Creek, so Mclean doesn’t have too far to fall in my eyes. All he has to do is deliver something marginally better than Primeval (or, if you wisely skipped that nonsense, half as good as Lake Placid), and I’ll give him a pass. Judging from the exclusive trailer just posted to ShockTilYouDrop.com… I don’t know that he’s pulled that off. It’s not so much that the film looks incredibly cheap; the real problem is that the crocodile ain’t big enough. If you’re gonna go big with your reptiles, go stupid big. If Primeval gives us a twenty-five-footer, you’ve got to double that shit. Bring the nasty. I expect nothing less than a fifty-foot motherfuckin’ crocodile with four rows of teeth, razor-sharp ridges across his back, and a bitchin’ racing stripe down his abdomen. It would also be a good idea if he could fly, ‘cuz then he could attack airplanes and go to the North Pole to fight the Abominable Snowman.

Rogue doesn’t appear to have anything like that, and this displeases me. Still, get me drunk enough next Friday (April 25th), and I’ll probably stumble into the theater to see this garbage. Love that poster.