We have a special guest MOD contributor today, Mr. Christian Perez. Please give him a warm welcome as he most definitely took one for the team on this one… –Renn


The Film: The Pumpkin Karver


The Principles: Robert Mann (writer/director), Sheldon Silverstein (writer), Minka Kelly, and Michael Zara.

The Premise: One Halloween night, Jonathan (Michael Zara) accidentally murders his sister Lynn’s boyfriend thanks to a prank gone wrong. A year later, they have moved to a new town to start fresh but Jonathan cannot seem to shake haunting apparition of the man he killed (who is now an evil pumpkin faced fiend thing). They attend a party on a pumpkin patch, ignoring the stories/warnings of a creepy old man, and decide to party hard anyway and it’s not long before the partiers begin dying at the hand of the apparition following Jonathan.

Is It Good: Not at all and that’s why I love it so much. The first time I watched this movie it was on Syfy when I was in high school and I received a call from a friend of mine asking me if I was watching it. He and I then proceeded to watch the entire damn movie while on the phone with each other like a couple of schoolgirls talking about boys. There was a sort of glee in our pump2conversation during the first viewing. We both knew that we were watching something horribly special that many others weren’t aware of and it becoming an in-joke that is still somewhat going on.

What makes it great is that it’s not trying to be bad. This isn’t like the horseshit Thankskilling that’s trying to be funny and fails and just ends up being a headache. No, this wants to frighten you and this wants to be good and it misses the mark in such fantastic ways. Whether it be the shoddy acting, the blatant make up during kill scenes, the weird slow motion bits, or the crazy ass old man that makes no sense. It just fails so well.

Is It Worth A Look: In my humble opinion, it is most certainly worth checking out. This is a special kind of bad movie just like other so bad they’re good flicks. The film doesn’t make a lot of sense but the acting and dialogue are simply hysterical at times and the inconsistencies in the plot really don’t matter and make the experience better. This is a film of faults and that needs to be acknowledged before a viewing. It’s definitely best watched with friends and a few beers but I have pump4seen it more times sober and it still delivers. If you find it in a bargain bin somewhere definitely pick it up.

Random Anecdotes: This was one of Minka Kelly’s (Friday Night Lights, 500 Days of Summer) first feature films thus allowing her to join the ranks of known actors/actresses who starred in shitty horror films early in their careers.

Cinematic Soulmates: The Room, Troll 2, and Birdemic.