Hello good people of the world. Today I begin a new “series.” This is meant mainly for friends and will most likely be excruciating for most other people as it will deal primarily with my pointless musings on life. An open diary if you will… So, feel free to skip right past these entries. Unless you care. In which case, thank you and I love you very much.

By the way, today’s blog goes good with San Jacinto. I have embedded a YouTube clip at the bottom. But if you own the original recording off of Security (Or PG-IV for the purists), turn on iTunes (plugplugplug) and feel free to play along…

So… Anyway… Life is, for the most part, good. My movie finally came out – so to speak, but there it is – I am restarting things in a serious way with my band and we may actually have a new album sometime next year. (New album? What about the old one Erix? Huh? …. HUHHHH?????!!!) More importantly though, I got my mojo workin’ … Jesus Christ in His Green Heaven I cannot believe I just wrote those words what the fuck is the matter with me? FUCK!

I’ve lost about 10 pounds.

Not quite there yet but getting there and feeling good about myself for the first time in a long time. Moving on. Making new friends and trying to enjoy what there is to enjoy and so on and forth. And I decided, why not? So I began a workout regimen. Basic stuff. Cardio and some free weights and benchpresses. God willing, I can get back into the shape I was in 2001 when I lived in Chicago. Maybe not an Adonis but, hey, I’d fuck me. Know what I mean?

And a very good friend of mine, whose name is Ramiro but he prefers to be called Ram by his friends, has a home gym. So, what better way to spend an afternoon than a homoerotic 90 minutes involving sweating and grunting by two heterosexual males…

Good times.

Thing is, the bastard lives in Llojeta.

AHA! And there is the reason for the title of this seemingly pointless and meandering blog.

What is Llojeta?
Llojeta is a residential neighborhood located just off the edge of Buttfuck and around the corner from the fifth ring of Hell in the region of Kingdom Come.  Only three bus lines actually go there and you have to go to a very specific location of Central La Paz to get them… You can also take special shuttle taxis (known by the laymen as Trufis) that also leave from a very specific location buried in the outskirts of another residential neighborhood known as Sopocachi. And these trufis usually only operate in the late afternoons and evenings. In other words, a pain in the ass. Why are there no more bus lines? Because the unions representing the current bus lines don’t want any other unions and their bus lines invading their precious bus line turf.

So fuck the unions and fuck anyone who actually supports those fucking unions.

You could also take a cab. But for what the cab would charge me, at three trips a week, I may as well join a gym instead of going to my friend’s home gym. Right? RIGHT???!!!

Right.

And so it is a bus… And riding that bus I can enjoy the wonderful scenery as it goes from Central La Paz and through Sopocachi… And past the place where there are no Trufis at the time you need them… And past the road lined with elaborate motels (They have themed suites, don’cha know) where executives go to play bingo bango fandango with their secretaries and cheat on their wives who for some reason remain married to these macho Latino douchebags who like to get drunk every Friday night with their friends and take secretaries to motels… Whew!

They also sing really loudly and obnoxiously at Karaoke bars (to their secretaries) and tell you to stop singing along if you sound better than them and get into fights with you and get you thrown out of the Karaoke bar but that’s a story for another time.

Whew!

And the road winds and winds this way and that, past an epic cemetery that’s supposed to be really nice and ornate. And it has sections with interesting names like Sector Jesus B-3 or something… A dash of cyberpunk in a garden of death. And, eventually, you get to what constitutes Llojeta itself… A cartoonish winding mountain highway with grotesque streets on either side and some really hideous buildings and houses. Arriving into and crossing through this meandering road is an experience so depressing that I have to thank the almighty farts in the wind that I have an actual pleasant reason for being in this Godforsaken place.

And then, finally, I arrive at Ram’s house. After dicking around, allowing my lunch to settle as I watch him eat a scrumptious plate of Spaghetti and meatballs that I will not be able to eat because I have to work out in a little while, I move on to my regimen.

Cardio. Stomach crunches for 8 minutes and six sets of punching the air like Rocky on speed.

Weights. 20lbs free weights… 45lbs benchpress… Wanted to go easy on myself.

I have not done much in the way of athletic prowess in over five years…

I looked and felt like Mr. Gabriel does in this clip by the time I was done.




Thank you very much.