I don’t know how someone as resplendently tan as George Hamilton comes spilling out of Renee Zellweger’s hoo-ha, but that’s not gonna stop the producers of My One and Only from casting the pale skin as the mother of the actor better known for his complexion than his actual work. 

Zellweger will play Anne Devereaux, a single mother of two sons who scours the entire Eastern seaboard for a wealthy husband.  I do believe they have a name for women who do this kind of thing, and I’m pretty sure EPMD wrote a song about it before Kanye West did his thing (all good things flow from Erick and Parrish making dollars).  In any event, the script by Charlie Peters – writer of such zesty confections as 3 Men and a Little Lady, My Father the Hero* and the recent National Film Registry inductee, Krippendorf’s Tribe – is based on a story Hamilton once told the late Merv Griffin; ergo, the mighty Merv Griffin Entertainment is co-producing the film with Raygun Productions and Artfire Films.  Y’know, I bet Merv heard better stories than this; I’m sure Jerry Lewis bent his ear once or twice about some salacious, double-teaming exploits at the Sands with Dean Martin.  Then again, I guess that movie’s already been made.

Zellweger is reportedly “nearing a deal” so she’s not cast just yet.  Provided she climbs aboard in a timely fashion, My One and Only will begin filming this April.

*”I’m dying now!?!?”