have to admit that I don’t understand why there’s so much secrecy involved with Star Trek XI. Even Karl Urban, seemingly woefully miscast as Bones, feels a little overwhelmed by it all: ‘I think the hardest part really is maintaining the level of security and secrecy that we have all been forced to adopt. I mean it’s really kind of paranoid crazy, but sort of justified. We’re not allowed to walk around in public in our costumes and we have to be herded around everywhere in these golf carts that are completely concealed and covered in black canvas. The security of it is immense. You feel your freedom is a big challenge.’

What’s the huge mystery here? I’m actually sort of baffled that Paramount didn’t release a picture of the main crew in costume on the bridge of the Enterprise weeks ago. My understanding is that not everyone has been on set from the start of shooting, but a promo picture like that would have helped sate some of the curiosity that leads to people with telephoto lenses staking out filming locations. Obviously this is all a JJ Abrams thing; he’s a secrecy nut, and he’s managed to parlay that secrecy into almost rabid buzz.

Urban also confirms that we’ll be getting our first glimpse of the film in a couple of weeks, in a teaser that will play in front of Cloverfield (Abrams is also a master of synergy. I think he may be one of the greatest marketing geniuses to ever become a mediocre director). I’m a little afraid this teaser will be wildly underwhelming; my guess is Chris Pine doing the ‘where no man has gone before’ speech over a starfield with a quick glimpse of the new Enterprise and the crew in costume, but not much else.

Seriously, Paramount: the time has come to reveal what these people look like in costume.