From: THE DEVIN’S ADVOCATE: CHEER UP, CHRISTIAN BALE
"This self-inflicted typecasting is going to have a
baleful effect on the man’s career.*"
"*See what I did there?"
Nick Replies: I’m getting 50% feedback that says "We Love The Asterisks" and 50% that says "Lose Them". Same goes for the repeated ‘Oh Don Piano’ references on the site. I am sort of in the middle about it myself, but I love The Accused jokes so what do I know?
I was looking at your website when I noticed that on
Smokin’ Joe Carnahan’s page he had a lot of cool looking Smokin’ Aces posters.
I’m moving into my dorm next year and am looking for some cool Aces posters
– is there any way I can buy some of the ones from
Carnahan’s page? If so please let me know becuase I can’t find any other than
the lame multi-colored one online.
Nick Replies: I don’t think there are actual printed posters available for most of those, rather a ton of really great unused concepts. You might wanna try to contact the site and see if you can get a Hi-Rez version to print on your own.
reviewed a while ago this old French film (from the 1960’s I think) that I
think had not been released at all until recently on DVD. It dealt with some
spies operating (I believe) during WWII in France as part of the resistance.
I’m not sure who it was that reviewed the film, but I remember the review being
extremely positive and full of praise for the subtlety and visual beauty of the
I was just wondering if you could give me it’s title because I’d very much like
to see a movie like that. Thanks in advance.
… and I caught something that I don’t believe many
people know about.
There is a sight gag when Winston shows up outside the
office to apply for the job. He looks up at the sign of the ghost, which come
to think of it, looks likes a Klansman, with the cross through it, of
course. So he thinks, "Well,
Is this news to anyone? If not, please feel free to reply
with "Duh" as the subject header
Nick Replies: I think it’s one of those smirk gags that doesn’t show up on people’s signature "Ghostbusters Moments’ lists, so I think you’re good for bringing it up. Klansman jokes are great!
I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed the feature on
the CHUD’s Top 50 Guilty Pleasures. I was inspired to write this one up
after I finished reading the list. I thought you might get a kick out of
it. If you don’t have the time, I understand, but I thought it was worth
Jack Patrick Rodgers
Wizard (1989, Dir: Todd Holland)
It’s a Guilty Pleasure: There are all kinds of guilty pleasures on this
list. The most common are the "so
awful they’re unintentionally hilarious" variety (like Street
Fighter: the Movie ). Then there
are the movies that have legitimately intriguing qualities buried under their
overall mediocrity (see: the kinky sexual undertones of Batman Forever). But the guiltiest of these guilty pleasures
might be those that coast by on nothing more than pure, unfiltered
nostalgia. Such is the case with The
Wizard, a blatant attempt to cash in on the height of Nintendomania in
1989 by taking the plot structure of Rocky and applying it to videogames.
The Wizard is usually criticized today for being nothing more
than a glorified Nintendo commercial stretched out to feature-length, but I
think that’s missing the mark. This
isn’t a movie that feels like it was designed by a corporation; it’s a movie so
naïve and misguided that it could have been made by children. The entire film panders shamelessly to the
kid wish fulfillment that you could run away from home and live successfully on
your own without having to obey any of your parents’ stupid rules. The whole story plays out like some restless
nine-year-old’s daydream fantasy: Corey (Fred Savage) rescues his
borderline-autistic younger brother Jimmy (Luke Edwards) from a mental home and
takes off with him towards California on his skateboard. Before long they’re making a small fortune by
gambling underage in Reno and having Jimmy play arcade games for money against
businessmen on their lunch break, living in hotel rooms, staying up late,
eating candy whenever they damn well please, and training for the national
videogame championships in montages set to "I Live by the
Groove." It’s totally rad to the
that’s why The Wizard is more than just nostalgia for the late
eighties. It’s really about a universal
childhood fantasy that’s dangerously out of touch with the logic of the real
world. (Only in a movie told completely
from the kids’ point of view would a bounty hunter assigned to find missing children be considered the
ultimate villain.) It’s the epitome of
movies that you loved as a child for speaking to you, only to grow up and realize
how stupid you really were at that age.
Moment: This one’s not even close.
After Jimmy’s cocky video game rival Lucas (sort of the Apollo Creed of
the Nintendo arena) racks up a ridiculous score on Rad Racer, he casually flexes his fingers, gestures towards the
peripheral on his arm, and declares: "I love the Power Glove. It’s so bad." The line is cheesy enough on its own, but
what’s truly amazing about this scene is that it managed to single-handedly
convince a large number of pre-teens with impulse purchase problems that the
Power Glove, one of the dumbest entertainment accessories ever, was cool. If you actually had the thing (I did not,
since my parents refused to allow any videogame systems into the house, fearing
they would stunt my social skills. – little did they realize I could manage
that on my own) you’d know it was compatible with about four games; otherwise
it was just like playing ordinary videogames with the controller awkwardly
strapped to your arm. Which is no fun
It’s Missing: I guess an upgrade to the dialogue wouldn’t hurt, but really,
it’s hard to name one specific thing that would have improved The
Wizard, because all of its flaws stem from the concept itself and how disconnected
the movie is from reality. Maybe just a
slight suggestion that running away from home isn’t a great idea?
Personal Connection to It: As a mostly-lapsed former videogame junkie, I’m
ashamed to admit that this was my favorite movie when I was in the fourth
grade. I recorded it off of USA late
night not long after, and the tape it’s on is still hidden away somewhere in my
It With: Your neglected inner-child.
Nick Replies: Thanks for all the effort you put into that. I am too old to appreciate that film. In fact I hate it. Cloak & Dagger is my guilty video game pleasure from my youth. That or Birth of a Nation.
Hey guys. I’ve
really enjoyed the "Chud Essentials" plus all the other list you have
compiled over the months. The
"Commando" one had
me laughing out loud at my computer (thank god I work
Anyway, I was wondering if you have ever thought of
publishing a hard copy version for these list?
Maybe you could use something like lulu.com .
Nick Replies: We have long discussed doing something just like that. What we lack: A person to spearhead the project and do the layouts.
are there massive Dead Rising ads on the top of every page? I understand a
solid website needs to run some ads, but this week has been horrible. First I
had those fat kids telling me to watch their movie in the bottom left, and now
this. Its crashed Safari twice in the past 10 minutes.
Nick Replies: First solution, get Firefox and kick Safari to the curb. Second solution, enjoy the free site that is kept alive by annoying Dead Alive ads.