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THUD: The Transporter TV show looks like a diarrhea grenade

The Transporter movies are a lot of fun, especially when the filmmakers were on the same page about Frank (Jason Statham) Martin’s sexuality. The third film was a terrible thing that seemed to embrace the lowest common denominators and scuttle what had been a fun two films laced with great chases, delightfully wacky combat, and a dearth of headhair.

In an effort to milk the threadbare concept of a driver who drives things around until the thing he’s hired for pisses him off and he quits his job to do exactly his job against the people that originally hired him to do his job, the folks at Cinemax (who make the excellent Strike Back, which I will unleash a review of tomorrow) have created a television show to showcase the concept’s limitations over a much longer period of time.

And without Jason Statham, the reason the movies were fun. Here the title character is played by Chris Vance, a man who looks like attempts to crossbreed Sting and Dylan McDermott were wildly successful. He’s from Prison Break, which is a dogshit show for those wondering.

Here’s the first trailer for the show (which went through some tribulations along its way from concept to poop tornado):